The simple answer is YES at times I feel like I have no friends at all. Then I go to my drama club and have nice conversations with the other members. Then occasionally Iāll get to talk to one of my online friends and help them with a project.
My thing is that these conversations donāt reach outside of specific circumstances. I donāt see my drama friends outside of rehearsal because they donāt invite me to their events. My online friends donāt really reach out to me unless they want something. It can feel like Iām only a part-time friend and can never get closer to anyone.
The way I cope with it is by remembering everyone is human too. These things are a two-way street and I know Iām not the best conversationalist and thatās okay. Time zones are wacky and people get busy and have lives that existed before I came into it.
Learning to appreciate time by myself does feel a bit bittersweet though. Iām hoping things become clearer for me as I get older.
