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lately ive been in touch with someone who i have a lot of complicated emotions about and in general ive been trying 2 be very level headed about it, 2 not go 2 hard in either direction. however yesterday we kind of ended up having a more relaxed and honest talk which then led 2 me pretty much spilling my guts out
i mainly wanted 2 give decent advice about a thing we both struggle with from a perspective of a person who lived and coped with it longer and that partially went into a lot more of a harsh subject matter. it seemed pretty useful at first but then the conversation slowed 2 a crawl and it was just me talking about my previous pain into the void
i don't exactly regret it, after all if we are 2 be close again in any shape or form we got 2 be honest with each other, but it still sucks because i went somewhere that's very much a sore subject for me and presumably for them. pulling this kind of act is pretty difficult emotionally and I just woke up and im still thinking about it
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I’m almost 30 have avoided this most of my life you can skip the agony of not knowing by having THE conversation even if it’s kind of painful it’s less and shorter term than if you (i) stew and suffer in silence until the love or whatever becomes festering resentment
May 26, 2024
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This would be something to talk to your therapist about it might open up some interesting lines of self-inquiry and greater depth if you can interrogate and push past these new feelings of resistance. And I am really sorry things are tough for you right now i hope life gets better soon. thank you for being vulnerable and seeking guidance!
Apr 17, 2024
i finally got a chance to say that tonight. that the long standing pain and confusion i found myself in finally gave way to a deeper understanding of my inner workings.
the beat thing i learned how to do was talk honestly with the people i hold dear. its terrifying, but absolutely worth sticking your neck out to get the help and clarity you need. goodnight fellas 🫶
Feb 5, 2025
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moments of shared humanity make me feel so alive. be it going to concerts and moshing or dancing, having a laugh with a friend or seeing and being seen. I value every connection ive got to make, even when things ended poorly. sometimes you go your separate ways and sometimes you reconcile after, but either way you leave changed. a lot of pain can stem from intimacy but i cant help but see my own future as very beautiful and bright
2d ago
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Every year me and my friends try to go to my favorite ramen place and after that we get icecream and have a nice walk in the downtown, maybe have a stroll through the boardwalk. If we still have energy we go home and watch something together.
Last year there was a concert directly on my birthday so that was my celebration. It was the most fun I've ever had and very cathartic. I'd recommend checking out some local events, seeing if anything is your style and if not just stick with the classics. I hope you'll have a nice birthday :)
5d ago
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