Not going to write another out of touch thinkpiece about how Rogan corrupted the youth since everyone with a Substack has beaten that dead horse already. Speaking from personal experience, I am okay, in that I am content with myself, and don’t think that anyone (especially women) owes me anything. I tend to keep sane company so I can say relatively the same thing about a majority of the male friends I keep, but men as a whole, in America? Nah. Too many men who think therapy is gay and have that grifter hustler Mister Moneyspread mindset.
I have zero clue how you could solve the issues men face today, but do think a good thing would be for men to stop idolizing scammers and grifters. That shit not cool, no one should strive to scam, and yet we have an entire genre of men who make it their entire career to scam or get you into some crypto fintech startup that’s funny with the money. That’s a terrible indicator of where men are now.
6d ago
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A lot of my friends (myself included) got married young; I myself locked down marriage by 22. What I’ve noticed is that when you’re married younger, you don’t get to develop into the generalized stereotypical douche bag archetypes that guys hit in their 20’s — indie sleeze ball, frat bro with allegations, overly into himself athletic dude, guy who is too niche into their hobbies, neighborhood womanizer, etc.
This doesn’t mean we’re perfect, just means we missed out on what could be peak horrific boy era that you see from 21-30. What has been weird though is seeing how many guys in that age range now are leaning into the…again STEREOTYPED incel/incel adjacent persona. It’s so strange. I don’t associate myself with many of these guys but I sure do see them (and hear about them) from my friends.
Tie that into the stereotype that men shouldn‘t go through therapy (for myself, inherited from a strong immigrant father who has done hard labor since 19) and you’ve got a really messed up bag of guys out there.
They either are horrible humans overall, or are just oblivious to what it means to be a normal person, or are in their own headspace and don’t understand why others aren’t thinking like them, or have fallen deep into weird religious and/or political movements that pins them as the victims.
In short: no, men are not okay.
May 24, 2025
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I read once that our culture teaches girls and young women that they have to work hard and plan to get what they want in life. Disney princesses have to take on a lot of responsibility.
Cis white men on the other hand don’t get those messages. We’ve always been able to coast along and our privileged position in society has meant we can end up successful without planning or withoutinitiative.
Now men don’t get by as easily as that, and they’re lost as to how to go about it. They do poorly in school, they lack self motivation, and they don’t get their shit together.
Huge generalities in there, and I’m plagiarizing an article I read, but it feels right to me.
I do think there’s something to the idea that American men are not prepared to fend for themselves in life. So I can imagine dating us is frustrating.
Jul 3, 2024
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ok maybe I shouldn't be so gender specific but hear me out. idk what it is but men will have exactly what they want in front of them. a cookie, a job, a woman, ANYTHING. if it comes in a way that feels slightly "too easily" to them they won't accept it. Vs: I find that most women live in an abundance mindset and are often open to receiving. And then women are taught things like "Men love bitches. Be hard to chase etc." which there's so much truth to that. Yeah, a healthy level of unavailability fosters attraction. But I think theres a deeper issue here and i'm only speaking on it because I find that I often become a symptom of a man's self deprivation.
To me it seems Men feel if there's no level of aggressive struggle or hardship to get the thing they want it's either "not real" or "they can't have it because they'll lose it too fast." It makes me question if it's a level of social media's illusion of options? How we as a society accept good things that arrive to us? At what level is chasing something and fighting so relentlessly that it's "enough" for your satisfaction and sense of reward and it feels valid?
shit drives me crazy.
I know you guys will cook me for this opinion but curious on your take.
May 10, 2025
Top Recs from @wakeuplmd
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Everything in your life does not have to be subscription based, and subscription does not equate a service being good. If I’m paying $24.99 a month to watch Netflix in 4K UHD, I should expect to see what I pay for, not subpar playback latency, low bitrate streams, many app crashes, and overall looking terrible on anything that isn’t a 4K display.
Remember when you could buy things and own them, like, forever?
There is a better world out there past Netflix, Hulu, Spotify and Amazon Prime.
Mar 15, 2025
You don’t have to tell everyone everything in/about your life, especially online, in today’s online yet frequently data-breached world. Like the great Christopher Wallace once said: Keep your family and business completely separated
Mar 24, 2025
I have a near-Biblical dislike of Allbirds shoes and every other Tim Cook Jeff Bezos Middle-aged Balding Pickleball coach ass shoe out there for convincing the public that these were in any way cool. No dude, you look like a loser with these. They look bland and lifeless, like they were concocted in the same boardroom that made the flat graphic design trend that Meta and Google love so much. Hell, even notorious ip-infringer Skechers makes better looking shoes than these. They don’t even feel good to wear. They have no soul or personality and yet some people swear by them. Who are these shoes for?
Feb 16, 2025