stray example: when i lived at my last place i set my phone alarm to only deactivate when i scanned a qr code in the bathroom down the hall - meaning that by the time i actually made it there, it was easier for me to just start getting ready for the day instead of going back to sleep.
identify the things that sap your willpower and engineer ways to make them really fucking annoying to engage with. then, find the things that you actually *want* to engage with and find ways to make them as effortless as possible.
eventually you will find that you get in the habit of doing the right thing often enough that it becomes your natural instinct and not something you have to specifically try to do. this has a compound effect over time - generally shit that is good for you has positive externalities that make it easier to do other things that are good for you.
Mar 5, 2025
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Ok essay incoming but I’m the same way and this advice is assuming that you have tried various ways to remind yourself of things (physical notes, reminders, alarms, schedules, to-do lists, whiteboards, etc) and struggled to respond consistently to this kind of stimuli. If you’re not already reminder-maxxing I recommend seeking out the most effective method for you to be unable to ignore the reminders. Might have to change over time as you become desensitized to one kind.
Once you’re seeing the reminders daily, the struggle is then acting on them. Seems obvious but sometimes when I’m struggling to complete a task or to do it regularly/form a routine, it helps to zoom in on my reasons for wanting to do it at all. Sure, running every day will make me burn fat and improve my cardiovascular health etc etc etc but sometimes for me with my neurodivergence those long term goals are too lofty and too postponable. Instead it really helps me to think about what kind of immediate reward I will get for completing a task or repeating a task—sometimes the immediate reward is just an immediate reward (“if I go for a 15 min run I’ll feel endorphin release ”) and sometimes it’s the removal of a punishing factor (“if I go for a 15 min run I’ll avoid the shame and anxiety of not doing the thing I said I was going to do today”. there’s a term for this in operant conditioning but I forget what it is). This is why for the really important stuff, I opt for a loud annoying alarm because one can only handle so much snoozing or postponing before it becomes easier to just do the thing.
Another piece of advice would be to harness the initial anxiety that a reminder prompts and act on it as quickly as possible, before the anxiety turns from motivating to crippling and before you can think of excuses/justifications for avoiding rather than acting.
I hope this helps! I’m far from perfect with this stuff and always having to adapt to my own ability to fall back but this has been the most consistently useful approach for me.
Nov 8, 2024
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oh lord this is going to be so dorky. there's a lot of productivity tools and techniques out there and believe me when i say that i have read a bazillion articles and tried at least 50 apps and methods, but these are the ones that have truly helped me:
TOOLS
1. Apple Reminders & Calendar – ngl i used ot underestimate these two apps, but they work really great because they have an acceptable natural language input, comprehensive and simple user interface, seamlessly syncs across multiple devices(if you're an apple user), and they work with siri. the only problem is that these two lack integration features. so to solve that...
2. Fantastical Calendar – i use another calendar app is to see all my tasks on apple reminders and events on my calendar app in a single calendar and to-do list, and yes, this app does that! it's great because it also has natural language input, enables me to view all my tasks and events in different ways like a calendar or list, and it has many functional widgets.
3. Obsidian – oof, i am found guilty. i built a second brain with obsidian which is basically like a system of knowledge and data mainly in the form of markdown files (a text document that has formatting) with internal links. i write down as much as i could – recipes, minutes of meeting, takeaways from articles, ideas for projects, trivia, literally anything! i also have a daily journal to reflect on the stuff i do, write down random thoughts and ideas blah blah you get the point. the purpose of all this is to have a centralized and organized system of information with links to each other and make it easy to retrieve information you may need for later.
TECHNIQUES
1. Prioritizing my tasks – when there's too much that needs to be done and i feel overwhelmed, i set priorities with the built-in feature of apple reminders. if im having difficulty setting priorities and want to get a clearer vision, i organize them by using the kanban plugin for obsidian.
2. Timers for when i feel lazy – basically the pomodoro technique but more flexible. i can set the timer for 20 mins or 2 hours or don't use a timer at all depending on how lazy i feel that day or how forced i feel on the task. the more i hate the task, the shorter the timer is, cause get this–i dont want to disrupt my flow state when im doing something i really want to do. why would i work on someth for 20 min and take a break when i love doing it so much i could go on for hours. also an important note...do REALLY boring things during breaks to make the task more interesting or enjoyable – avoid triggering dopamine as much as possible.
3. Establishing scheudled habits – this helps me build consistency with the things i want to do more of. for example, i have a daily wake-up and wind down routine which consists of really simple things like washing my face and brushing my teeth, stretching for 2 minutes, drinking water, journaling. i also set a goal for myself to read a book and learn french every day. think of anything you want to do more of and set a schedule for yourself when you should be doing it and stay consistent with that schedule so your body and mind would get used to it.
4. Setting up a distraction-free environment – this is pretty self-explanatory. throw your phone away, paint the walls white, and get sound insulation for your room.
THE MOST IMPORTANT THING
SELF-CONTROL – without it, nothing is really going to work smh
May 27, 2024
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the work-eat-scroll-sleep-repeat pattern had me in a chokehold for ~3 years after I graduated from college, realized that a large part of the reason I struggled to break the cycle was because I’d want to “rest” after work but eventually do something enriching in the evenings, but didn’t actually have an idea of what I wanted to do so the lift to get off [app] was less willpower and more decision paralysis; the friction of figuring out what to do was what was keeping me in the cycle ~90% of the time.
what has worked for me:
1. going outside immediately after work (especially if working from home) to run an errand or go to a book or record or coffee shop
2. keeping a list of projects i want to / am currently working on or skills i want to develop and making progress on those
3. reading a book
4. (most effective) taking a class (writing, pottery, filmmaking for me) and either going to the sessions or doing the assignments
but also sometimes you literally just wanna rot and that’s cool too!
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i tried a couple different ways to structure my time:
1. daily timeblocking (3*/10): setting 5-6 to wind down; 6-7 for dinner; 7-9 for enrichment; etc… didn’t work at all for me. too structured.
2. theming days: (5*/10): mondays are for reading; tuesdays writing; etc… worked slightly better but sometimes you wanna do a different thing than the theme, introduces decision paralysis of whether to power through to build routine or to follow your instincts and have max fun
3. big list: (7*/10): here are all my projects (and subtasks) or hobbies or chores or errands i want to do; i give them a number score of how urgently i want to do them, then do the one i want to do most thats higher priority. bonus points if at the start of the week or month, you put some activities on a calendar for specific days even randomly to just have a schedule when you don’t have something you’re particularly called to do so that’s your default activity and not scrolling. works the best*!
(*for me)
Jan 16, 2025
Top Recs from @dotmatrices
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spent the last two weeks working on an interactive guide, recommendations database, and digital library (link depot) to help get people off of social media. the first draft is done now, and it's at the link to this post.
it's still very much a work in progress (the library is especially thin atm) - which is why i wanted to share it here before unleashing it upon my IRL friends and the general public. i welcome any and all feedback, bug reports, and suggestions for things to add. i will be pushing updates to it out like a madman in the coming weeks, so be sure to check back every so often to see new additions to the database and library.
additionally, i am still on the hunt for newsletters from local venues / community organizations / magazines / newspapers, etc. the only cities i have remotely covered so far are nyc, orlando, denver, brisbane, and little bits of worcester and chicago. if you know anything in your area that fits the bill, send it my way!
Jan 27, 2025
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it is your civic duty to mercilessly mock generative ai users as much as possible
Jan 18, 2025
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chronological feeds on social media are a dying breed and it's so important to maintain the ones you still have
Apr 7, 2025