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EMETOPHOBIA...

gonna be extra real on here ! i have severe, debilitating emetophobia. like the kind that renders you agoraphobic. I've been an emetophobe since i was little but it's never been this bad before. i have panic attacks daily, I'm constantly exhausted and eating, sleeping, and going outside is becoming harder and harder as the days pass me by. do not be alarmed though, I'm in therapy and I'm on luvox although i wouldn't say the latter is working much. i went to knotts berry farm yesterday ! it was supposed to be a milestone in exposure, a really good one since lots of people filter in and out of the park every day. i ended up going on two rides, eating one churro, washing my hands thrice and kind of just calling it a day. plus it was super cold so it was just all just kind of a bummer. i decided to end the day on a good note and snag some peanuts merch (as u can see from my pfp, i am a HUGE woodstock fan), so i bought a Woodstock figurine and small plushie. best part of my day honestly, I'm glad i did that for myself. it is now the morning after and I'm sitting here just really nervous and panicky because I can't stop thinking about the possible illnesses i could have picked up at the park. i know I'll be ok no matter what ends up happening, and i have plans with my friend in about an hour so i'm still challenging myself and my instincts to hide. i just wanted to put it out into the world. emetophobia is shackling and limiting for a lot of people, and i also want people to know that they CAN do difficult things in the midst of it. my phobia and ocd has held me back in many situations but i don't want it to keep me from doing what i love. even though that knotts trip kind of sucked, the world didn't end and a day later i'm sitting here next to my super cute woodstock plushie. also that churro i got at the park was the best churro I've ever had !!! if u ever go to knotts u NEED to get a fresh churro they're so freaking good. you can do hard things. even if it sucks, that one experience doesn't have to control you. these are basically self-affirmations lmao. gonna go get brunch now with my friend bye bye !

@ikhk5087

Mar 27, 2025

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“Stay afraid but do it anyway”

I have big anxiety and panic disorder and often avoid or put off doing anything that causes me any sort of discomfort. This quote has helped me come out of that bubble. This is the full quote; “Stay afraid, but do it anyway. Whats important is the action, you don’t have to wait to be confident. Just do it and eventually the confidence will follow”. - Carrie Fisher 🫶

@postergirlwithnoposter

Nov 1, 2024

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A possibility for relief

I have been dealing with this for almost a year. There were some events that I think kicked it off. Maybe worse since the pandemic started. But! What has been really helpful is understanding that anxiety is showing up in the body because the body does not feel safe. Anxiety is a message to the brain! And sometimes that mechanism gets all fked up and misfires. Doing somatic therapy with a therapist that I really like and think values my concerns has been helpful. I do body and environmental awareness exercises. These help me increase my sense of safety and trust of myself. It's gotten about 15% better since I started. I hope you feel relief soon. Shit is so hard.

@pekoparty

Jan 23, 2025

Top Recs from @veronjque

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We talk with our hands. Yes, I’m one of “those” 🍝

This thing always makes me smile. When I was little I never thought that something that came so natural to me could be perceived as weird/intriguing/surprising by people from other cultures. Growing up I understood that for others it was fascinating and funny, in some kind of way, to see us Italians, in our cities, in bars, restaurants, in squares, in the middle of the street, communicate with one another using very specific hand gestures paired with very specific facial expressions. It’s not just casually moving our hands up and down chaotically to emphasise what we are saying. I swear, we are able to communicate with each other without saying a single word, just using hand gestures+the facial expression associated with that gesture (we have at least 250 specific hand gestures). The roots of this sociological and anthropological phenomenon are to be found in the history of my country.  Basically for a long time Italy was not a unified country, we had dialects and languages that were different in every region, we had what we call “Signorie”, ruled by rich Italian families, then reigns that were ruled by Austria, Spain, France and so on. Basically, we couldn’t understand each other. Latin was the language of the educated, and Italian vulgar (Italian of the origins, which then gave life to the Italian spoken today) was not yet spoken. The only way to understand each other was through gestures. Even now, if a Venetian had to speak in dialect with a Sardinian, and the Sardinian had to speak in Sardinian, they would not understand well, but if they had to use the gestures they would understand instantly. I would love to create a sort of tutorial for italian gestures, maybe one day?  If someone knows a gesture, you can ask me what it actually means.  Maybe I can start with the most famous one, and the most misunderstood of all: “🤌🏼” When do we use this and what does it mean?  Let’s start with three different situations were you can use this gesture, even though there are more (the intensity of the meaning varies from the situation ur in): 1) What do you mean? (move the hand not to fast, up and down, close to your body) context: a friend says something that you don’t understand, you are confused. Facial expression: a kind of grimace with the corners of the mouth pointing downwards, the slit eyes (as when you can’t see well from afar), the eyebrows slightly frowning. You are not angry, just confused. 2) Start by raising a bit your open hand in front of the person you are facing (✋🏼-> meaning “stop”, “wait a minute”), then proceed with moving up and down your hand “🤌🏼”, turning the hand horizontally towards you chest. You’re not agreeing with what the person is saying, you’re a bit nervous, this gesture means “wait, what the heck are you saying?”. Facial expression: similar as the first one when you put you open hand up (bit more confused), then when you move the hand horizontally, accentuate that expression even more, with the mouth straight and clenched. Context: you are pissed, not angry. You’re starting to get angry. 3) Raise your arm horizontally, the hand is still in this position “🤌🏼” but turned horizontally as well. With a lot of emphasis, move the arm towards your chest and then facing it towards the other person, repeatedly. Meaning: “WHAT THE F DO U WANT?” Or “WHAT THE F ARE YOU SAYING TO ME?”. Context: someone insults you, someone makes you very very angry by saying something. Facial expression: the face you do when you’re really angry 😤. (this is not good because this means an argument is going to start).  If you want a part 2…let me know? I don’t know if this is interesting, or if it was clear.

@veronjque

Apr 30, 2024

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Its been a long time since i saw myself

Lately anxiety is not helping much, and I’m constantly drained due to exams coming up. I miss my family. I miss myself. This made me reflect on the fact that I’m still here, and also…we are such precious creatures. We diminish ourselves, but everything we touch we influence. We are way more powerful than we think we are. Anyway, let’s see what we have here: • a fraction of “THE wall”: from left to right two postcard I bought last summer at the Musée des Beaux Arts in Bruxelles (“Georgette” by Magritte, a pic of Magritte himself, on the bottom a quote I found in a fortune cookie, then a quote I found in a “Bacio Perugina” a chocolate treat that is very well known here in Italy, on top of Magritte two Js as you can see (this is a CRAZY story), then on a post-it a quote of a thing I wrote in a sort of essay, then a poem that my best friend wrote for me, another fortune biscuit’s quote, a post-card from a place in Italy called “Sacro Bosco” (Sacred Wood, also know as “Parco dei Mostri” = Monster’s Park), it’s an old black and white photo of a young boy grazing the sheep 🐑), two more post-its (one from roomies one from my mom). Yes I have a thing for post-its… • books I started and I never get the chance to finish because of uni (I really recommend though “Whatever arises love that” by Matt Kahn aaaand to start educate urself on Palestine (if you haven’t already started you should, it’s great) “Mornings in Jenin” by Susan Abulhawa) • Abat-jour, lamp, whatever you call her, with a “necklace” (bracelet I made with my granny when I was little, my wrist grew so the lamp suits it better as a lovely necklace), on top a sleep mask. • a notebook (I love it, the red one), on top my two pairs of reading glasses. • Forest green water bottle (very used, but I love her) • A ceramic jewellery holder, which was of my beloved grandmother, with jewels I inherited from her 🥺 • a thing I use to store my bangles and bracelets (my little treasure, they’re all vintage/inherited) • one of my thousands of candles (I don’t know why they ease my anxiety) and mini Corto Maltese (in my opinion a masterpiece in the world of comic-strips) themed matches.

@veronjque

May 12, 2024

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I realised he really took notes

He was particularly fixated on changing his style. He was no longer comfortable, he wanted to look good, feel good. He often asked me for advice, he wanted an honest opinion from a friend (he had also asked another friend of ours in common). He asked for honesty without sugarcoating it: I went into detail on which colours would surely highlight his light-blue/green-ish eyes or his complexion (I insisted on how blue navy would’ve suited him), I told him it would have been perfect if he wore a nice shirt every now and then. Simple jeans, more classic cut pants. A good haircut. I did not see him for a few days, then... He showed up at Uni, walked by me and I didn’t even recognise him, he proceeded to sit by my side and I didn’t even turn around because I thought he was a random person that I didn’t know. He touched my shoulder and said, "Hey, we don’t say hi anymore?" with a big bright smile. He really took everything literally. Friends? Sure. Did I pay attention to a single word that was said that day in class? Absolutely not. I want to scream now.

@veronjque

Jul 16, 2024