I cannot and will not be able to tell otherwise. My partner told me āIām crazy about youā after weād met (weād been texting for a few weeks) and I was like OH COOL HE ACTUALLY LIKES ME. I have historically been a dummy for lovebombing cause I only really respond to this, but I wish more normal people had been that direct then maybe I wouldnāt have dated so many horrible people before meeting Billy. (this is also why Iām so pro dating app, because at least you know the person at least fancies you without having the guess).
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Someone from a dating app texted me last night saying "[...]I typically[...]am kind of primarily a lesbian lol, but you seem cool and fun and nice so am looking forward to meeting up and feeling out the ~vibe~."
As a bad queer, as someone who is usually interpreted as a gay man, my little nonbinary lesbian heart aches/flutters
Jun 13, 2024
Backstory: Im crushing so hard on a tattoo artist near my job and am delusionally convinced sheās my soulmate. We coincidentally have matching tattoos of the cover art for faces by mac miller high on the thigh. (for full story go look at my asks)
Update: aightā¦ went to the tattoo shopās 8th anniversary event just to kinda be present and participate in the art community in Puerto Rico bc Iām having trouble finding ppl I relate too and I think I can make friends w them. Didnāt rly get to chat with her much, she was being a little distant and I wasnāt going to corner her or anything. I ended up getting some flash that was super cool. after my tat was finished late that night I went for a walk to shake off the nerves of the pain n shit. Ended up getting a strange feeling to buy a bunch of ice creams for everyone in the tattoo shop party so I walked far as hell and bought like 20-30 ice creams from a 24hr bodega and came back to pass them out to everyone for free. Boom. wonderful success and made so many ppl smile. Now the shop owner n community know me and recognize my chill.
Additionally: I could not get this girl out of my head. Like I never rly date and I fr donāt like talking to girls. Im rly hyper-isolated but itās my own doing. But she Was driving me crazy. I ended up buying her the Book of Mac memoir and planned to give it to her as a gift/tip at our booked tattoo session. I had a feeling that sheād rly like it. But that wasnāt enough. I became manic and over the course of three sessions I made her a mac miller mix. Ive attached it for u all to listen. This mightāve been overkill and I was second guessing it the whole time but I did it anyway because Iām not a pussy.
Finally: get to the tat session and was greeted with a kiss on the cheek (polite and customary for Puerto Ricans but she was rly friendly about it and she initiated). When she finished setting up our station I sit down and pull out the book. Inside the book I had written to: (her name) from: (me) and a short quote from BMO (adventure time) because it kinda just felt right. tell her hey I got this for you, I think I have a crush on you idk, but yeah this is for you. Bruhā¦ she melted. She was like soooooooooooo happy. She had a mask on cuz she was sick but she said underneath she was blushing super hard.
we start the tattoo and I ask if I can just talk to her while she does it. Iām rly shy and not the best at convo but throughout the entire tattoo I just picked her brain to try and get to know her. Bruhā¦ we r so alike. Like mind blowingly alike. Talked about music and movies and clothes. But she was kinda dry and quick w her chatting. It took a while for her to warm up a bit and relax. Plus Iām funny so she was giggling after every other thing I said. Teased her a bit. Flirted a bit. But nothing too heavy. By the end of the tattoo session we were on aux together going back and forth w songs talking about why we like them n stuff. Like at this point I can tell weāre friends. Finally the tat is finished and itās great. Sheās an apprentice and not super experienced but it was exactly what I wanted. As we were saying our goodbyes she thanks me again for the book. I told her I had one more thing to give her but she had to give me her number firstā¦ she freaks out a little bit. I say no pressure obviously, but sheās like āyes pressureā Iām like what?? She gives me her number and gives me a super quick and tight hug. Idk how to describe it but it was like a shy, fast āI need to hug you before anyone seesā hug. as Iām walking out the shop I text her the link to the mix n head home.
I get home, she texts saying thanks for the mix that itās rly cool and thanks again for the book. and thenā¦. She tells me sheās dating someone š„“ and didnāt know how to tell me in person and froze when I asked for her number n if its alright if weāre just friends. I ate that punch, said hey no prob we can be friends, which is totally fine like I fr donāt mind, but the thing is I KNOW MY WHOLE SCHEME WORKED. Like the way she was reacting to me and how comfortable she got and how cool our convo was like I know she recognized how cool I was. And she told me I was rly cool like she texted saying she thinks im cool. So likeā¦ fuck. Idk. and She didnāt even say she has a boyfriend, she just said sheās dating someone so it doesnāt even sound serious. Idk what to do. She didnāt respond to my last text. so this is where we stand. I think I fucked her world up tho. No way sheās not thinking about me now.
What do yall think?
Jul 19, 2024
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Whatās That? Oh, we both love steely dan and hate cyclists that wear the little outfits ? (Not bc we hate the fit- we do, we just hate that they give you a dirty look when they roll through a stop sign and itās your turn to drive more)
it starts with you liking one of my recs (obviously), then, feeling generous, I like one of yours thatās either a micro-complaint or link to a specific, hard-to-find performance of an ethereal 70s jazz singer.
We follow each other back andā¦ the rest is history as they sayā¦
And by history I mean we dm on Instagram nightly until eventually we meet people that live on our own coasts and our flirtation becomes merely a memory
But a beautiful one at that
Jan 26, 2024
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5d ago
I used to be envious of people who had āMySpace friendsā or ātumblr friendsā. Now I have PI.FYI friends. Thank you capyboppy for your lovely letter and this illustration of a capybara and a mouse with fruit on our heads, it made me weirdly emotional ā¤ļø
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