He likes to say we met on Tinder because he knows it annoys me lol. Our very first meeting was on New Year’s Eve of 2016 at a house party. He had the same name as one of our mutual friends (“S” from here on out for anonymity’s sake) and I kept riffing with him about that and ended up hugging him when I left, my long hair got in his mouth and he still remembers that lol.
He was the drummer in my friend‘s band and I’d ask about him often; each sillygoofy funny tale made me more interested and led to a little facebook stalk session. My friend mentioned that they were going to a birthday party for one of S’s friends. I begged if they could get me an invite and funnily enough that same day S saw us walking down the street and texted them “you and your friend look good in red.” The invite was secured!
That night, I got all done up and went to the party and immediately got blasted on some sangria. I cornered S and talked to only him the ENTIRE party, mostly discussing a bracket my brother and I had made to determine the best disney channel original movie. He was so kind and sweet and funny and did not make a move! Which was a huge contrast compared to all the thirsty gross dudes I’d normally encounter at parties.
For the next couple months, we’d see eachother around at coffee shops and exchange smiles and quick hello’s. One day on a beautiful early Spring afternoon I was sitting outside at a coffee shop reading Marx for homework and saw S. He sat outside nearby me and I said “ok this is silly!” and told/asked him to join me.
We sat there for three hours as a rotating cast of characters came through. We’d see friends and they join for a spell and go on their way, the funniest addition was my friend and her 12 year old brother. I had to get to class so we parted ways and I was still surprised he hadn’t made any moves or even any objectifying comments, not that I wanted that, but that’s generally the way I’m used to men interested in me acting. I figured he had a partner, wasn’t straight, or simply wasn’t interested in me.
This was the golden days of Tinder so one night when I was trawling through the city’s singles, I finally saw S on the app. This was my shot and I was not going to miss it! A simple ”swipe right” would not do my, I used my daily free superlike and held my breath. We matched! I don’t remember the first messages but it was something like “well, finally!” and we planned the first date.
Apparently, he had a massive crush on me from our very first meeting and thought I was way out of his league so he wrongfully assumed my overt flirting as was just a platonic offering of friendship. We have been together ever since and are happily married and still more in love every day. He has gotten me through so much and I cannot imagine my life without him, love you my beautiful husband!!!
This is your sign to shoot your damn shot!!!
6d ago
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@MOSSYELFIE ty elfie!!!🥹 im still so grateful we found each other, truly two halves of a whole!
6d ago
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I wish I had a screenshot of his profile from back then. He had a terrible tinder profile. He had one recent cute selfie as his first pic. But most of the pics were blurry and several years old. His bio was very generic something like “Hi I like video games and anime.”
I was at a point where I was playing tinder like a game. I had a suggestive bio. I meticulously picked my photos to come off a certain way. I’d swipe right on so many people just because I was bored. And almost everyone would just send some shitty perverted pick up lines referencing my bio.
Not my boyfriend though, he super liked me and immediately started a regular conversation. We started to talk every day on tinder and eventually Snapchat until we met in real life after two weeks.
We celebrate our first date as our anniversary because we’ve basically been together ever since.
5d ago
We moved to Washington, DC in 2016; two strangers with suitcases arriving on the very same day. He by train, me by plane. Our paths wouldn’t officially cross until eight months later, but after comparing notes, we figured out that we were in the same rooms, repeatedly, without even knowing it. We went to the same concerts in the Luce Gallery, frequented the microcinema in Mount Pleasant, browsed the racks at the same record stores, and fell in love with the same Nam June Paik installation at the American Art Museum.
We matched on Tinder, as with many millennials on the apps. In April of 2017, we went on a first date in the park by my house. Drinking Stiegel Radlers, complaining about work, and the general weird vibes of living in DC during that specific political climate. We parted ways, claiming we’d keep in touch, and proceeded to ghost one another.
Fast forward to the fall of the same year. We’re back on the apps and we’ve matched again—7 months later. We decided to grab coffee in Georgetown, welcoming a chance to reconnect. And then coffee turned into a walk. The walk extends into an hourslong affair in hopes of catching the full moon rising. We went to the White House, peed in a hotel bathroom, and finally found ourselves in front of the Weather Underground house in Adams Morgan, six or seven hours later. We split up content that we’d hang out again soon.
Little did we know that that long walk would turn into a never-ending story, or better yet, a story with a happy ending. We saw each other a few days later, discovering our mutual love of physical media. I even brought a tape recorder with me to record snatches of conversation. What are the odds that the girl with the massive VHS collection would meet the boy with the massive cassette collection, who hosted a monthly cassette night at a local bar? After five months, we decided to cut our commutes, merge our collections, and move in together sooner than most would advise.
From our home, we weathered the historic government shutdown, a global pandemic, and countless protests—finding comfort and safety in a world of our making. We moved to Chicago, I started and left a PhD, we both found new jobs, we bought our apartment, started a gallery in our living room, and our family grew to include our dog, Momo.
If there’s one thing our relationship has taught us, it’s that it’s okay to perpetually be in a state of becoming. Whether that’s giving one another a second chance at a first date, exploring different career paths, trying and failing at new recipes and hobbies—within the solid foundation of our communion, we can be whoever we want to be, and whoever we might become. So here’s to second chances and the longest second first date in the world.
Feb 14, 2025
Backstory: Im crushing so hard on a tattoo artist near my job and am delusionally convinced she’s my soulmate. We coincidentally have matching tattoos of the cover art for faces by mac miller high on the thigh. (for full story go look at my asks)
Update: aight… went to the tattoo shop’s 8th anniversary event just to kinda be present and participate in the art community in Puerto Rico bc I’m having trouble finding ppl I relate too and I think I can make friends w them. Didn’t rly get to chat with her much, she was being a little distant and I wasn’t going to corner her or anything. I ended up getting some flash that was super cool. after my tat was finished late that night I went for a walk to shake off the nerves of the pain n shit. Ended up getting a strange feeling to buy a bunch of ice creams for everyone in the tattoo shop party so I walked far as hell and bought like 20-30 ice creams from a 24hr bodega and came back to pass them out to everyone for free. Boom. wonderful success and made so many ppl smile. Now the shop owner n community know me and recognize my chill.
Additionally: I could not get this girl out of my head. Like I never rly date and I fr don’t like talking to girls. Im rly hyper-isolated but it’s my own doing. But she Was driving me crazy. I ended up buying her the Book of Mac memoir and planned to give it to her as a gift/tip at our booked tattoo session. I had a feeling that she’d rly like it. But that wasn’t enough. I became manic and over the course of three sessions I made her a mac miller mix. Ive attached it for u all to listen. This might’ve been overkill and I was second guessing it the whole time but I did it anyway because I’m not a pussy.
Finally: get to the tat session and was greeted with a kiss on the cheek (polite and customary for Puerto Ricans but she was rly friendly about it and she initiated). When she finished setting up our station I sit down and pull out the book. Inside the book I had written to: (her name) from: (me) and a short quote from BMO (adventure time) because it kinda just felt right. tell her hey I got this for you, I think I have a crush on you idk, but yeah this is for you. Bruh… she melted. She was like soooooooooooo happy. She had a mask on cuz she was sick but she said underneath she was blushing super hard.
we start the tattoo and I ask if I can just talk to her while she does it. I’m rly shy and not the best at convo but throughout the entire tattoo I just picked her brain to try and get to know her. Bruh… we r so alike. Like mind blowingly alike. Talked about music and movies and clothes. But she was kinda dry and quick w her chatting. It took a while for her to warm up a bit and relax. Plus I’m funny so she was giggling after every other thing I said. Teased her a bit. Flirted a bit. But nothing too heavy. By the end of the tattoo session we were on aux together going back and forth w songs talking about why we like them n stuff. Like at this point I can tell we’re friends. Finally the tat is finished and it’s great. She’s an apprentice and not super experienced but it was exactly what I wanted. As we were saying our goodbyes she thanks me again for the book. I told her I had one more thing to give her but she had to give me her number first… she freaks out a little bit. I say no pressure obviously, but she’s like “yes pressure“ I’m like what?? She gives me her number and gives me a super quick and tight hug. Idk how to describe it but it was like a shy, fast “I need to hug you before anyone sees” hug. as I’m walking out the shop I text her the link to the mix n head home.
I get home, she texts saying thanks for the mix that it’s rly cool and thanks again for the book. and then…. She tells me she’s dating someone 🥴 and didn’t know how to tell me in person and froze when I asked for her number n if its alright if we’re just friends. I ate that punch, said hey no prob we can be friends, which is totally fine like I fr don’t mind, but the thing is I KNOW MY WHOLE SCHEME WORKED. Like the way she was reacting to me and how comfortable she got and how cool our convo was like I know she recognized how cool I was. And she told me I was rly cool like she texted saying she thinks im cool. So like… fuck. Idk. and She didn’t even say she has a boyfriend, she just said she’s dating someone so it doesn’t even sound serious. Idk what to do. She didn’t respond to my last text. so this is where we stand. I think I fucked her world up tho. No way she’s not thinking about me now.
What do yall think?
Jul 19, 2024
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