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I recommend having a one on one with a close friend (or lover) at least once a month to help get out from under that clutter in your brain, renew your bonds, and heighten your emotional availability.
I know this will not work for everyone but it may help to pair it with an activity like going on a walk or having conversation structured with interpersonal games like We Aren’t Even Strangers (or if anyone else has any other recommendations it’s the platform to send in comment section below).
XO
Jan 29, 2024
Related Recs
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I wish I knew why, but the following has worked for me:
-A lot of people say to just go to stuff but it does work! Finding an event that is relevant to your interests, and going solo guarantees a good time - you’ll either have a chill time by yourself or will get to chatting with other people that went alone too. I went to an art studio opening party because they had a build your own flower bouquet arrangement set up, with a still life drawing session of your bouquet afterward. I made a lovely friend who went alone too! Even if I didn’t meet anyone, it wouldn’t be a lost cause because I still went to something that was enjoyable for me on my own.
-Maybe more of a deeper cut option that’s not always possible, but I’ve also met folks that are friends of friends. Having that person in common does make things a lot easier.
Wishing you the best of luck! 🤠
Apr 18, 2024
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I definitely feel like this sometimes but most nights I do loveeeee being alone (in front of the TV). To answer your question, I’ve found that socialization ebbs and flows. The most regularly I was seeing all my friends is when we had standing weeknight meetups like trivia on Tuesdays, watching a show together on Wednesdays, etc. My personal sweet-spot for “spontaneous” plans is 2-4 days in advance. I’d text something like “Having a hard week! Let’s do something fun this weekend” then you can gauge from there :) Trivia is a really good one though it brings people out of the woodwork.
May 15, 2025
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I like having scheduled plans, so I always try to plan hangouts. There are some friends that flake, which bothers me; I understand that things come up, but if flaking is a regular thing, then I feel unimportant and that you're not making an effort. If a friend flakes, I expect them to put in effort in rescheduling a hangout.
I also attend community events for things I enjoy (yoga, reading, dance, etc.). Maybe friends come; maybe I go solo and meet new people. Either way, there's a social interaction.
Bc I WFH too, I've been trying to reach out to other WFH friends to see if we could WFH together. And/or WFH at a cafe (consistency probably helps - i.e. going to the same cafe rather than always changing it up) to meet other WFH peeps.
I'm still trying to find my community.
May 15, 2025
Top Recs from @matthew
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This could be one of those rare things that – somehow – reminds you who you are, or who you used to be, those parts you thought were gone. (And trust me, there will be threads. So many threads.) I’ve learned, too, that there are whole stretches of life where you’ve been a stranger to yourself for so long that admitting it feels terrifying, insane even. But without that one thing to confess to, to get honest with – to untangle the mess of ordinary, maddening thoughts – you might never know what’s actually there, buried under the static.
Nov 14, 2024
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Taking your time to increase the quality of what you are doing will improve almost every activity or outcome.
Dec 26, 2023
I stumbled upon this relic in a nameless California town I forgot the name of, probably because thrift shops are like existential quicksand. It’s the perfect prop for those friend-argument moments, an almost absurd metaphor for dismantling our emotional walls between us. Plus, its sheer randomness guarantees everyone will question your sanity rather than the sentiment. 💯💯💯💯
Aug 3, 2024