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the barista playing my bloody valentine was a fever dream scenario
Jan 28, 2024

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the date started as getting coffee but she mentioned having a paper due and we’re both in grad school so she said we could do a fun coffee/study date and have “cute banter” in between working. we ended up going long stretches of time not talking because she was very focused on her paper, but the talking that did happen wasn’t what I would call cute. she kept saying “literally peed my diaper” to say that she was excited, and at one point she left to take a phone call and like gargoyle squatted down in the grass. when she came back she went into detail about some family drama she heard from the phone call. overall just very weird vibes, when I described it to friends later I said she gave Gayle from Bob’s Burgers vibes, she even kind of looked like her. i’m tryna find me a Linda tho. here’s the recreation of the phone call pose I did later when I was at the same coffee shop with friends describing the date
Feb 18, 2024
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Just flirted w a barista over both us having a salamander tattoo life is so beautiful
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he made a joke about burying me in his backyard...when the date ended and i was driving home he texted me "get home safely, i can’t kill you if you're already dead"
also a lesser offense but i was in college and he'd never went to college yet he insisted on giving me advice about college
Feb 18, 2024

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