The dullness of the everyday march toward death is spruced up quite a bit with a little BDSM. Or if you’re me, a total power exchange. Benefits I have received from practicing this for 10+ years:
- Reduced anxiety
- Feeling of childhood traumas being healed (neither of my parents love me lol so having both a husband and an Owner/Dominant to recreate that 2-parent-esque love & protection & constructive discipline I should’ve received as a kid but didn’t has really helped me more than therapy or medication ever could)
- Feeling gorgeous I mean come on
- Intellectual/psychological stimulation of the highest order, brain on fire
- Increased creativity
- Decreased desire to die
- Fun feeling like you have a little secret
- Connection with another human that is both pure safety and pure danger & god that’s delicious
- A feeling of purpose, freedom, letting go, trusting, and never being let down
- Fun accessories
Caveats:
- Requires months if not years to build trust
- This ain’t some 50 Shades bullshit, don’t let anyone stalk you or disrespect your boundaries without consent
- Safety is going to be extremely important
- Do not do this with anyone who hasn’t done the workshopping or training to be sure they aren’t harming you psychologically and/or physically on a permanent basis
- Trust no one until they prove they’re trustworthy
- Dominant partners have limits and need aftercare, too. Do not assume that just because someone identifies as mostly dominant that they have no feelings and are up for anything
- Ask someone who has been in the community for a long while for advice or vetting (I am always happy to help protect anyone from harm)
- Do not underestimate the number of untrustworthy people who say they have experience in this, but turn out to be complete frauds who just want to abuse you and hurt you and take zero responsibility
- Hotbed of traumatized, unhealed people. Proceed with caution. There are places to find genuine, lovely folks. At the end of the day this should be fun For all parties involved