💄
You have to haul your face around for your entire life, and there’s just no getting around it. As someone who is lurching perilously toward what us old people refer to as “the wrong side of 40,” I am here from your future to tell you not to be afraid, because you can retain your hotness with a little planning! Ever since my very best stage mother and personal BFF Lena Dunham publicly called me out for my elaborate skin care regimen, I’ve been getting questions, so let’s start at the basics and move into the baroque… I don’t think expensive products really make a difference, but if you love them and they make you feel good, by all means waste the money you should be saving for treatments (more on that in a minute) on a 50 step routine—it’s your life! I prefer to streamline because I am old and tired, so while I have definitely tried all of those ritzy oil cleansers and I DO LIKE THEM, in general I think Cetaphil and a microfiber cloth is fine. I usually only wash my face at night and follow it up with some Retin A mixed with a nice heavy moisturizer or oil, and I seal the whole shit in with Aquaphor before going to sleep on a special pillow that doesn’t deform my face. The morning is when things get complicated, because I am a firm believer in all of those gadgets that dermatologists tell you don’t work: I like a red light mask followed by either microcurrent, a muscle stimulation device, or radio frequency, and I follow that up with a CE ferulic serum, hyaluronic acid, moisturizer, and sunscreen. Take your collagen and a vitamin D-K supplement every day, and stay the fuck out of the sun!
Feb 28, 2023
Related Recs
🧖
This recommendation is just an umbrella to tell you about all the things I use in the hopes that it will keep my skin looking nubile dewy and fresh. I'm a woman who dates younger men, so I’ve got to keep the elasticity of my face tight, baby! It's a nightmare out there! So here are some things that make me feel like I have some control over the inevitable deterioration of my face and body.The following recommendations are for exfoliating, moisturizing, and the regeneration of collagen: Good Genes by Sunday Riley, Omnilux red light collagen producing face mask. This mask is terrifying. This shit will scare away any person you're dating. Which might be a good thing. If they can’t handle you at your worst, they don't deserve you at your… zzzzzz. Collagen powder in my smoothies. I met a 70 year old woman with perfect GLOWING skin, barely a wrinkle and she attributed it all to daily collagen powder. Everyday Oil - smells incredible and I truly believe it is a magic potion that makes everything better. Use it all over your body. Including your face, Epsom salt baths (good for relieving water retention and also nice for sore muscles). I’ll pour 3 pounds of epsom salt, as well as Shea Butter and Almond scented bubble bath, and luxuriate in a bath for LITERALLY (and I’m using the word ‘literally’ correctly) for 3 hours. Every man I’ve EVER been naked with says I have the softest skin because of it. They can’t ALL be lying. Actually, I take that back. They could be.
Mar 31, 2023
🪐
This one's for the girlies (and anyone else who's into skincare) - as an elder, I wish I had committed to using retin-a (tretinoin) sooner. some things I like about tret are:
1 - not having to pay attention to the million new products out there, I have become immune to marketing (I still get to try new moisturizers, HAs, and Vit C serums)
2 - it makes you remember to wear your sunscreen daily, I'd be terrible about that otherwise
3 - no more fine lines (if you don't have any, using will delay you getting them)
4 - you can now order it online from most places without having to spend money on a derm
5 - a tube will last longer than most products from sephora and costs as much/less - more bang for your buck
6 - supposed to be good for acne, I cannot report on that, but others swear by it
i've generally had good skin and get the "you're how old? noooo" but I wish I had committed in my early 30s to build the habit and do more preventative maintenance.
yes the purge/peeling sucks, but once you get on the other side supple babyface glass skin awaits you.
Feb 4, 2024
💆
Taking care of my skin has boosted my confidence more than anything ever has. Right now my nighttime routine is wash my face with Bobbi Brown soothing cleansing oil, curolgy, retinal, hyaluronic acid, vitamin C, the ole henrikson undereye cream, and triple antibiotic ointment. My morning routine is washing my face with Sonya Dakar gentle facial milk cleanser, spray my face with Osea sea mineral mist, Osea hyaluronic sea serum, Sonya Dakar nano hydrator moisturizer and Sonya Dakar SPF 30. If I go outside a lot I use 50 spf. I had cystic acne when I was younger and Curology really changed my skin. It completely cleared it up. I’m so grateful for it. When I was younger I tried absolutely everything. Salt water, mouth wash, that nuetrogena face wash with the micro plastics in it. Nothing really worked until Curology. I also take Tri-Sprintec birth control because it is the most effective at clearing your skin. If I have a break out I take Doxycycline which is an antibiotic that stops acne from forming. It’s been a lot of work and not easy but I’m so happy I did it. I love face masks too. My favorite is Blue Tansy from Herbivore. It’s a nice exfoliator that really changes your skin. I notice a big difference with it. I also love sheet masks. Innis Free has my favorites. They just feel so effective to me. A nice evening to me is staying in and taking care of my skin. I love to steam my face, do an exfoliating face mask, then a pore cleaning one and then a moisturizing one. Then I do an eye mask and all of my skincare steps. It feels so good and I look amazing when I wake up.
May 26, 2022
Top Recs from @alissa-bennett
🍸
My true passion is whatever fucked up combination of drugs and alcohol you consumed the last time you woke up and said “never again.” The Instagram account @regret_counter serves as an archive for your bad nights out, and though I am its humble bureaucrat, I am mostly just a fan of your fortitude, your bad choices, and your capacity for White Claw.
Feb 28, 2023
🪦
I love cemeteries, and living in New York gives us proximity to some of the east coast’s great jewels. Deliver your regards and a Coca Cola to spendthrift heiress Barbara Hutton at the Woolworth family’s sphinx-guarded mausoleum in Woodlawn Cemetery, have a picnic in Sleepy Hollow, or spend a day at The Hartsdale Pet Cemetery , America’s oldest and greatest eternal resting place for rich people’s animals. If you are of a mind to travel, do not miss the spookiest family plot in all of America, Stockbridge Massachusetts’ Sedgwick Pie (it’s also just a stone’s throw from Edith Wharton’s house), or skip over to Rhode Island (my ancestral homeland) and take a tour of our little state’s notorious smattering of vampire graveyards.
Feb 28, 2023
📚
Society’s punitive cruelties are meted out by women in Jacques Doucet gowns and condemnation is served over terrapin with a Roman Punch chaser, but don’t let Edith Wharton’s antique references distract from what is really being offered here: a soul-crushing buffet of confessional gossip more contemporary in texture than one might think. Masterpieces like The Age of Innocence and The House of Mirth often get shunted over to the retirement village section of the bookstore (those shitty rotating racks of classics that are tucked discreetly in a corner so they don’t offend culture’s youthful sensibilities), but if you can’t find them there, don’t be afraid to march right up to the counter and ask in your loudest and most self-righteous voice what kind of establishment doesn’t carry Edith Wharton. Read The Custom of The Country for Edith’s eviscerating portrait of Gilded Age venality and follow it up with a couple of her ghost stories.
Feb 28, 2023