Our bodies are the least interesting thing about us, and I feel sad that so many people, including myself, have these self-limiting beliefs that imply that it is not true. It's feverish. I lost weight once a few years ago. I ended up gaining it all back, plus some, and to be honest, I have been emotionally torturing myself since then, and let's be even more honest, I really have been emotionally torturing myself for my whole life. I want peace, and I want my body not to control my actions and decisions, and I want it not to restrict me further in my life. I fantasize a lot about what my life will be like when I finally get it together, and I don't know if that will ever happen. It's like I'm yearning for a lover I will never have and everyday I'm like damn if I could only get kissed by that lover my p*ssy would be dripping , and I would probably eat more fruits and vegetables , and shake my ass at the sun and maybe wear a thong to the beach and lay in the sand , and let the sun kiss my face and my body WITHOUT being afraid of getting skin cancer , and getting exterminated.