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i really really resonate with this! iām trying to pull myself out of one too. some stuff thatās helped me before in the past is asking some of my dear friends for prompts ā either super specific or super vague. it helps me to work within the guidelines of something.
also making something based on a dream can feel more forgiving because itās explicitly not grounded in my own reality.
and scheduling art/creation hangs if that appeals to you! i love the accountability of doing it with others, and itās also a great way to get in some lovely quality time.
i hope any of this helps! and i also hope youāre as kind and gentle to yourself as you can be, itās so hard sometimes ā¤ļøāš„
also making something based on a dream can feel more forgiving because itās explicitly not grounded in my own reality.
and scheduling art/creation hangs if that appeals to you! i love the accountability of doing it with others, and itās also a great way to get in some lovely quality time.
i hope any of this helps! and i also hope youāre as kind and gentle to yourself as you can be, itās so hard sometimes ā¤ļøāš„
5d ago
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š«honestly it really made me understand my autonomy and the larger role i play in shaping my own life. iām in complete control of the life i want to build and nurture.
life is hardālike, really fucking hardāand thereās no rulebook. weāre all just figuring it out, and thereās no one ārightā way to do it. for me, itās been helpful to focus on my values and what truly makes me happy and/or brings me joy. when do i feel most at peace? what makes me feel loved? how do i stay grounded? so when life inevitably gets toughāand it always doesāi have tools to navigate it and avoid feeling soā¦shitty.
there was a limit to how much i could lean on my support system. donāt get me wrongā my friends, family, and community were so critical for me during this time, but i had to be honest with myself: i needed professional help š . now, iām here, feeling like i can actually liveāand enjoy life.
ditto to what everyone has said above. sending virtual hugs š©·š«š©·
life is hardālike, really fucking hardāand thereās no rulebook. weāre all just figuring it out, and thereās no one ārightā way to do it. for me, itās been helpful to focus on my values and what truly makes me happy and/or brings me joy. when do i feel most at peace? what makes me feel loved? how do i stay grounded? so when life inevitably gets toughāand it always doesāi have tools to navigate it and avoid feeling soā¦shitty.
there was a limit to how much i could lean on my support system. donāt get me wrongā my friends, family, and community were so critical for me during this time, but i had to be honest with myself: i needed professional help š . now, iām here, feeling like i can actually liveāand enjoy life.
ditto to what everyone has said above. sending virtual hugs š©·š«š©·
Dec 4, 2024
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š©»When youāre in a slump, youāre in a slump.
Let yourself feel things. The good and the bad. I welcome them like a visitor and I invite them at the pretend dinner table in my head and get to know them, and I try not to ask them why theyāre here. Why I feel things. I just let them be. Know that this will pass, just like a person visiting for a few nights and I try not to hold on to them when theyāre ready to leave (yes those feelings will pass). Sounds very clichĆ© but they do.
From my experience, the longer I fight the sadness/depression/slump, the longer it stays. Iāve learned just to take it day by day. This wouldnāt be possible without months of therapy where it was revealed to me that Iāve been so hard on myself almost my entire life.
I also meditate every night for 15-20 minutes. I take this activity so seriously, just a few minutes to close my eyes and release the tension Iāve felt the whole day. I love staying still. I love to close my eyes and think of nothing. My drive will come back.
What also helps (for me) is taking a few minutes a day to go outside and letting the sun touch my skin. It feels so good. Listen to the birds. Listen to the traffic. Just observe your surroundings and remember that there is life outside you and you are a part of something big and eventually you get inspired by something. May it be small or big. It will come back to you.
Be gentle and kind to yourself <3
From my experience, the longer I fight the sadness/depression/slump, the longer it stays. Iāve learned just to take it day by day. This wouldnāt be possible without months of therapy where it was revealed to me that Iāve been so hard on myself almost my entire life.
I also meditate every night for 15-20 minutes. I take this activity so seriously, just a few minutes to close my eyes and release the tension Iāve felt the whole day. I love staying still. I love to close my eyes and think of nothing. My drive will come back.
What also helps (for me) is taking a few minutes a day to go outside and letting the sun touch my skin. It feels so good. Listen to the birds. Listen to the traffic. Just observe your surroundings and remember that there is life outside you and you are a part of something big and eventually you get inspired by something. May it be small or big. It will come back to you.
Be gentle and kind to yourself <3
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ši think what helps/is ābestā depends on the breakup and the timeline.
if itās like, three months and your main approach is still distraction that may make it harder in the long run. but in the first few weeks i think itās okay to just distract yourself! i also think what is helpful is a mix of distractions. so maybe at the worst moments watch a sitcom, but at other times it may be helpful to read or watch media about heartbreak.
itās nice to feel seen / see how others get thru it, even fictionally. i love to watch fleabag. 10 love poems and a song of despair and crush are two beautiful poetry collections.
a small āgirlsā/friends night at home can be nice because it will be both fun and youāll get an opportunity to talk things through with friends. + therapy is always another talking option, both in the cases of if the relationship wasnāt the best or if youāre just having a really hard time (which is valid!)
one of my heartbreaks was sorta a similar situation to yours (she got with the person she told me not to worry about right after!) so i want to say 1) i know the feeling sucks and iām so sorry! and 2) itās totally possible to get through this moment, and you will ā¤ļøāš©¹
i also wrote some advice on working thru heartbreak a while back! š©¹ space, music, journaling, hobbies https://www.pi.fyi/rec/clwha3jpj02x510qsyswdwxjg
Aug 8, 2024
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celebrated the first day of pride by moving in with my lesbian lover :-) iām overjoyed!!!! happy pride, everyone š§”
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