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Today at work, someone was training to fall of the roof, a stunt at the end of all of our cowboy shows. When he fell I saw this dark spot on his neck, with itty bity legs too! I thought i‘d be the hero and snatch it off his neck, so i yelled, “yo hold up you got a tick on your neck“ and i pushed his head out of the way, yanking at the “tick”. It was IN THERE, so i just kept pulling on it, but everyone else around was like, “wait that’s a mole…” and the guy said “im just jewish it’s okay”
12h ago
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Last night I was kept awake at 1:30am by an incessant scratching and biting sound coming from my ceiling. At first I thought it might be pounding rain, but it was gnawing in one spot for too long. I then noticed a bright orange light start flickering within my fire alarm. I located the sound, and considered running for the broom to knock on the ceiling and scare it away, instead deciding to let it do whatever. I half expected a possum to fly down onto my belly. Maybe a top secret spy possum who would carve a perfect circle into the ceiling and rappel into my bedroom. Anyway, it sounded huge. I have opted for telling nobody anything (my roommates, landlord) and keeping the creature my own secret.
Apr 9, 2025
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I was working at a greenhouse that stored tropical plants over the winter for wealthy clients and someone's "man" -- I don't know what his actual job or relation to this client was and only ever heard him described as this -- was due to bring a delivery truck with 6 or so 10 foot tall lemon trees in pots. This was the day that only me and another small non-man employee were in the building, but we were told he had a handcart and we weren't expected to move anything. But then he did, I fear, drive the truck into the building for a little kiss because he didn't know that the height of the truck was several feet taller than our garage door. And then as me and my coworker were jogging up to the door yelling for him to stop, he did of course repeat this for some reason. And then he was so rattled he basically begged us for help moving the delivery down from the truck onto the floor of the greenhouse.
For reference if you've never seen a lemon tree they get BIG ASS villainously sharp spines on the branches that are spaced out just enough they're difficult to spot, so moving them is harrowing. Especially when they're so tall that the person navigating the handcart has the branches directly in their face once the cart is at an angle sufficient to push it and you have to 100% rely on a buddy to direct you forward. And even moreso! When you're looking at your coworker like is this guy tweaking!! Is he going to drop this big honking spiked tree on us or himself!!
Anyways we all lived and we didn't drop the trees and later he explained he was just a little eepy so it's fine!
Apr 26, 2024
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small boy put a plastic roach under some packaged sliced ham on the grocery store conveyor belt. i jumped
Apr 2, 2024
Top Recs from @zeekfujita
The lyrics are CRUSHING sometimes, and are surprisingly relatable like no other genre i’ve encountered.
1d ago
even crazier experience is just digital photography, on this tiny, glass brick in my pocket!!!! you mean i get to zoom in, see what i’m taking a picture of, take the picture, and see it all in a matter of seconds????
1d ago
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Last 12 years they‘ve been by my side, and now i gotta graduate and never use google apps EVER again bc old people hate good user interface idk.
2d ago