1. listen to peoples actions not what you want to believe about them. no response is a response.
2. you forge the chains you wear in life. alternatively: no one gives a flying fuck, why are you making your life more miserable by policing your own life?
3. in order to get something, hold it lightly in your mind with gentle hands and take small actions towards it every day.
4. you have to take care of yourself even when it’s hard and you don’t want to. think about what would be best for your future self? not your tired self! and sometimes the answer is: go to sleep right neow!
May 29, 2025
Related Recs
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i’m not gonna go into the state of politics in this country, frankly I enjoy that this site has been a politics free space for the most part. with that being said, resigning to despair and the feeling of powerlessness serves only the status quo. inaction is not the solution, nor is waiting for the government to be what you want it to be. politics over: here’s the rec
be the change you want to see
as much of a cliche as this saying is, i’ve grown to believe in it with my full being as i’ve gotten older. for the things you have control over, for the practical needs that you can meet within your community, for the little things you can do every day to ease someone’s burden or generally be a pleasant interaction in someone’s life: bring to the world what you feel it lacks.
where you live there are likely already communities that are arising to support each other and call for change. seek those out if that’s a motivating notion for you. participate as much as you are able and as little as you please, every bit counts. being a visible and tangible example of how the agency we all have can create something better will motivate others to find their voice. a lot of people feel like you, but even a few in action is better than multitudes in despair.
community is so key, and the world we live in has created a situation where isolation is the default so that individuals are forced to rely on the market or the state to meet their needs. how much better would it be to have neighbors and friends as a support network, mutually exchanging their time and resources to strengthen the communtiy and invest in relationships that benefit the whole. the moment we all realize that we can do for each other what the world tells us we need to do ourselves, the stronger we will be and the more we can come together and enact real change from the bottom up, rather than being divided in pleading for a top down approach.
this may sound revolutionary because we have become so detached from community that we cannot envision the changes in our model of living that would have to be made, but it’s sooo not that deep, and it feels more like investing in the good in others than sacrificing personal comforts. it can look like:
- shopping at a local business vs a corporate chain, get to know the staff, get to know your fellow patrons
- spending time with friends, there doesn't need to be a reason or occasion. make meals together, drive together to go do something, maybe literally just be in each others presence as you do daily life, share each others sacred presence amidst the mundane
- give things you don’t need to a friend who does, exchange clothes, exchange favors, share knowledge and resources, lend a skill or a craft, donate things if you don’t know someone who can use it, exchange things and experiences without the need for monetary incentive
- create things together, make art together, share and exchange media, try things for the joy of experiencing them without the need to be “good” at it,
- grieve together, worry together, talk out negative feelings, commiserate, support, encourage, motivate, share your accomplishments, celebrate together
- get to know your neighbors, why is everyone in isolation while in such proximity?
- get off that damn phone if it makes you feel bad, you wont miss out, the world happens outside of it, unlearn FOMO
- enjoy nature, go on walks, get outside, sweat and run and jump and see the sky
- remind yourself that life is about what happens right now, don’t be concerned with what could be or what was if you are unable to affect it in the present.
- go to a concert at a small venue for an artist you’ve never heard of, bring friends, don’t preclude experience for the perceived necessity of entertainment
- unlearn grindset, but also unlearn bainrot. don’t fester in your down time. rest can be active, activity can be restorative. your time is precious and you will meet your need for purpose and direction by literally choosing to pursue a “meaningless” hobby in even what little time you may have vs scrolling and taking psychic damage.
- learn to enjoy the abundance of freely available joy in this world, we have been tricked to believe that money is the sole provider of a happy life
idk i’m just becoming mindful of what brings me life in this world and so much of it is available to me solely by seeking it out instead of idleness in my free time under the guise of “rest.” so much if it comes from seeing the divine in others and creating bonds and relationships and support networks. so much of it comes from enjoying beauty and art, and moderating and savoring that experience vs endless consumption and media gluttony.
the world through a screen is bleak, the world in front of your eyes can be beautiful, the system is broken but you and everyone you know has some untapped agency. anyway imma get off my soapbox, go catch a firefly or sit around a campfire with the homies. you’ll be glad you did.
Jun 29, 2024
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you really couldn't pay me to relive this year. but the lessons im taking away from it were more than necessary, even if they had to be forcefully taught to me over and over. first lesson: the simplest things are hardest to understand.
like being your own best friend. or to not give others too much of your time. to look after and love yourself before even thinking of doing the same for others. to walk away from friendships you've lost with a renewed desire to use all that new time being with yourself instead. not just on your phone but really getting to know yourself. that people come and go in life and you are the only one you have forever so have love and kindness and patience for yourself the way you do for others. things that sound simple right?! that keeping yourself busy and putting off your emotions will only make them bigger. that you can only love someone and know someone as much as you love and know yourself. to make moves in silence so they're actually accomplished. not to wish ill on others even jokingly. not every problem needs to be confronted immediately, decisions can be dwelled on. it's good to sit and think. even when it hurts not to, don't argue with others. again, its okay to sit and think those thoughts instead. reflection hurts and sometimes hurt is needed. go on more walks. face more of your fears. don't forget to freaking write in your journal everyday so that when you DO write it's not about how "damn".. you haven't written in so long. throw stuff out. eat more fruit. Post less, worry less about time. stop regretting everything. actually read the books you borrow. everything in moderation. don't skip a meal and work before play (im a grown adult saying this) take a deep breath once in awhile. a clean house is a clean mind. making your bed feels real good. the simplest things are the hardest to get. i hope to go through more painfully difficult things in 2025 that i think i won't possibly get over until i do.. happy new years ⋆𐙚₊˚⊹♡
Jan 1, 2025
going through some similar motions and this measely tiktok comment unironically did like +1000 healing to my psyche. really, the key is to remember you can only do so much at once. overexerting yourself will make you too tired to consume the fruits of your labor. they will rot and/or you will not enjoy them this way. find happiness in the little, fleeting moments you’re able to foster for yourself and bite off only what you can chew. besides, you want to make sure not to do things in haste. you want a solid foundation for future you and your contentment and don’t want to find any cracks in it later down the line…
Sep 24, 2024
Top Recs from @chronicwebuser
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@TYLER
please let us be free from the commodification of the data generated from our social, whimsical, and sincere, free expression
the sincerity of this app is because it’s different from those other apps :/ why do we need metrics on how we socialize? 😮💨😮💨
i’m curious as much as i am sad about the decision to make the star count visible. is that what its proper name is? or are we calling it likes? 👀
Apr 23, 2025
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to me being perfectly imperfect means sincerely expressing the full range of human emotions in community with all y’all
the positive and negative and every emotion in-between
living is messy, thanks for witnessing my mess
May 17, 2025
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i've been seeing piffies posting about, and I myself, have experienced The Yearn.
i've sat with my feelings about relationships through many seasons. i was with someone for 10 yrs, we got engaged, i broke it off. although he was an incredible person, he was not my soulmate. i've had a few relationships since then and have felt The Yearn.
after being dumped this weekend i have some thoughts to ask myself when looking at dating / The Yearn.
1 -- are you seeking connection or attention?
2 -- is your relationship an excuse for you to not work on other parts of yourself you know you need to take time to face?
3 -- how are your friendships? do you have people behind you that will see you through any season? keep those people around FOREVER. maybe marry them instead.... lmao 😳
4 -- have you dated yourself? was it full of joy and love?
5 -- can you (within reason - we can NOT exist and heal with out each other) meet your own needs and care for yourself?
6 -- how honest are you with yourself? you'll only ever be able to be that honest with other people, no matter the relationship.
7 -- are you just trying to follow a story arc that you *think* you *should* follow? see link: relationship escalator
my goals right now are to build up a family of people that will be with me forever! it's not a ton of people but it's enough! if i find a "soulmate" or "love of my life" along the way then like... nice 😃👍 but like that's not my GOAL. if you are young and reading this, i wish i knew in my 20s (am 31) what i am writing in this post. i g2g tho ~ ily, be well!
Mar 17, 2025