I was set on a fine arts path for a long time, then wanted to combine that with my interest in psych and become a music therapist. Then I got stage fright during my clarinet scholarship audition and threw up on the stage and decided I could never show my face in the music department again. I stuck with psych and added anthropology.
I loved my social sciences classes but I decided to take a development class online during my first summer of college, and I loooooved it! I remembered how much the brain fascinated me as an organ and how neuroscience may be a better fit for me than psychology. So I emailed my advisor and we ended up changing my whole life around to build a curriculum that mimicked what I’d be taking if my school had a neuro major. Then, they developed a neuro major and I was one of the first to graduate from it! Took me an extra semester but oh well lol.
I got multiple job offers, and took the one farthest from South Dakota. I ended up in a random suburb in Maryland at a clinic/research facility that worked with children with abnormal sex chromosomes (XXY, XYY, X, etc) since that can significantly impact cognitive development. But this place was so shady and everyone who worked there was miserable, so I had to leave. I found my next job and worked at the old job less than 90 days!
But this new job would have me questioning myself and my intelligence on a daily basis. There were days when I loved it and felt like I was doing something really cool and special and interesting and important! But most of the time I was sad and scared and anxious and ended up really hating myself and the work. And this is unfortunately how a lot of grad students feel, but I wasn’t a student! People mistook me for one, or even for a post doc sometimes, but I just worked there!! I was going through all of that for 3 years of my life and I don’t even have a degree to show for it smh
So I thought about what else I wanted to do with my life and decided to go back to school for occupational therapy! I want to help people directly, and I know first hand that animal research really does help people (I’m on an antibody that was developed inside of rodents lol) but I want to do that more tangibly. And I still want to have it pertain to neuroscience in some way, and OT would allow me to help people recover from strokes or TBIs or maintain a level of autonomy during age-related cognitive decline! So I’m currently taking classes so that I can be ready to apply to the OT doctorate program in my state :)
But going back to the job…I lost the job last month… And now I haven’t been working in weeks and I’m about to get my last severance paycheck and the job search isn’t totally going how I’d hoped…but it’ll be okay, I’ll find a way through this chapter and I’ll make it into that program and it’ll work out eventually, right?
And if a patient likes to make music I might end up being a music therapist of sorts after all!
May 29, 2025
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It’s weird because you’re told that you’re smart, in gifted and talented classes, praised but only when you do well in your studies. Your desire to feel praise and love from your parents leads you down to study the sciences even though you really wanted to study geography at university.
covid hits the year you graduate and it’s hard to find a job! a good 2/3 years pass of fruitless attempts to find a job in the scientific field. so you go and study for your Masters in Oncoimmunology hoping it’ll be enough academic experience to land you an entry job but it’s not and no one cares that you studied hard and no one care that you love your area of research. it’s a tough market atp i just wanna be a home maker so I can play video games all day and hire a cleaner.
Ive been feeling sososo dejected recently from applying to jobs, have a first class masters but no experience so no one wants to hire you? like damn bitch come teach me??? ME???
Mar 20, 2025
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I went back to school in 2020 to persue a career in a field I’ve wanted to be in for prob 2 decades. I went to college right out of high school but it didn’t work for me at that time, I got terrible grades and gave up despite being a high achieving straight A student before.
I just finished my program and graduated in May and started a new job at a big name firm and to say I’m a little spooked is accurate. Not finishing my degree all those years ago was a source of shame for me and I’m finding myself putting a lot of pressure on myself because the accomplishment is so personally significant.
The learning curve of a new job is always steep and feels like you’re flailing a bit, and I can only believe that new career will be that same feeling, amplified. Trying to feel confident, trust that I am in fact capable, and not like I’m about to be found out. 🫠
Go for it! The scary parts are required! Personal growing pains mean you're trying and expanding.
Jun 19, 2024
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just wrapped my MBA program so ya boy has two degrees now (already scheming how to get a third). missed my grad ceremony unfortunately because I got COVID so I’m 0/2 now on actually attending my graduation ceremonies because of COVID.
ramping up my job hunt which is like pulling teeth to me but I had an interview today that I feel like went ok so we up
about to move into a muuuuch smaller apartment and excited for the part of town I’ll be in but also worried about managing the downsize but ready to be out of my current spot.
overall feeling very grateful for the new people i have in my life rn and the place i’m in, just ready to be settled for a bit after this period of change ends.
Aug 13, 2024
Top Recs from @random-online-nerd
this photo is from september 2018 and I still haven’t seen anything like it since
May 26, 2025
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That’s just not what we’re doing here
6d ago
I got him at a particularly difficult point in my life and I’ve had him for 6.5 years now wow!!! He’s always been big, just much larger dimensions than a normal cat as well as being a little chubby lol. He’s a sweetie pie and is finally coming around to his little sister 💛
19h ago