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maybe i’m just being nitpicky. the whole AI thing has been spoken on, and I am so hypocritical on, i do use it, frequently. I do still think it’s an issue, i do feel like i did at some point lose the ability to think for myself because of a reliance on AI. but even so, just the reliance on typing. yeah, i do prefer it, but i could still write pages and pages without much issue i do believe analogue work is just as important. people complaining about their hands hurting after just a few pages ://. to each their own, i think people need to write more, and think for themselves more, and be able to sit comfortably in not knowing who they are.
ALSO, people need to walk, if you can, move ur body. so much is being lost to cars, and computers, and AI. it’s just sad.
also lithography is dying. thank you for reading my brain dump.
May 27, 2025

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Apologies if this is strongly worded, but I'm pretty passionate about this. In addition to the functions public-facing AI tools have, we have to consider what the goal of AI is for corporations. This is an old clichƩ, but it's a useful one: follow the money. When we see some of the biggest tech companies in the world going all-in on this stuff, alarm bells should be going off. We're seeing a complete buy in by Google, Microsoft, Adobe, and even Meta suddenly pivoted to AI and seems to be quietly abandoning their beloved Metaverse. For decades, the goal of all these companies has always been infinite growth, taking a bigger share of the market, and making a bigger profit. When these are the main motivators, the workforce that carries out the labor supporting an industry is what inevitably suffers. People are told to do more with less, and cuts are made where C-suite executives see fit at the detriment of everyone down the hierarchy. Where AI is unique to other tangible products is that it is an efficiency beast in so many different ways. I have personally seen it affect my job as part of a larger cost-cutting measure. Microsoft's latest IT solutions are designed to automate as much as possible in favor of having actual people carry out typically client-facing tasks. Copy writers/editors inevitably won't be hired if people could instead type a prompt into ChatGPT to spit out a product description. Already, there are so many publications and Substacks that use AI image generators to create attention-grabbing header and link images - before this, an artist could have been paid to create something that might afford them food for the week. All this is to say that we will see a widening discrepancy between the ultra-wealthy and the working class, and the socio-economic structure we're in actively encourages consolidation of power. There are other moral implications with it that I could go on about, but they're kind of subjective. In relation to art, dedicating oneself to a craft often lends itself to fostering a community for support in one's journey, and if we collectively lean on AI more instead of other people, we risk isolating ourselves further in an environment that is already designed to do that. In my opinion, we shouldn't try to co-exist with something that is made to make our physical and emotional work obsolete.
Mar 24, 2024
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I worked in a lab that used machine learning to identity things about cells and tissues that would take a human years just due to how time consuming it would be to count and compute by hand. Other science applications are potentially finding cancer earlier and earlier for better outcomes. People also sometimes clown on people who need chatgpt to make a grocery list for them, but I think assisting people with ADLs could be really beneficial too (though there’s getting to be some tricky nuance with people using it for too much instead of letting themselves be challenged a little and idk where to draw that line). I just don’t want restaurants to use AI generated photos on their menus, I get uneasy with people submitting photos of themselves to be transformed with AI, and I don’t think art, poetry, literature, etc should use AI. The whole point of being creative is to do the creating, not to get a computer to do it for you lol. And people said similar things about digital art, but with that you’re still picking up a stylus and physically doing the work yourself and not just typing in a prompt. And this isn’t even getting into the libraries that AI trains on and if everything in there was acquired correctly or if it’s stolen…
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I have some subscriptions expiring soon that I can’t financially justify anymore so I’m on that article grind and for I suppose sadomasochistic reason many of these articles have been about ai and I simply can’t get behind these overeducated assholes proposing it has any humane, beneficial qualities at all. (It is quite literally inhuman.) the main argument always seems to be efficiency or offloading the emotional labor of navigating your own life and an argument that essentially boils down to ā€˜fuck the elderly and disabled leave them alone isolated in their homes or institutions with their screens and an algorithm fed on bigoted rhetoric that hates them’. You have to keep the whimsy to remember the time ai saves you is worth nothing if it keeps you from your friends and family and passions and general Ć©lan vital. (Also that nothing is worth the environmental racism, air pollution, and quickening towards the water wars necessitated by data processing centers.) in the scope of universal relativity, the laws of physics, space and time, string theory probably, it is a miracle that any of our consciousnesses have been realized as a tangible collection of cells cloaked in flesh moving around on the single life sustaining planet we know of among one another, each individual their own fantastical miracle at the crosshairs of time and space. That you are ever anywhere with another person has cosmic implications. Whimsy and recognizing the secular miracle of existing is what makes it all mean anything. They want us to forget our miracle of being and sign our time and eyesight over to the ai that further resigns you to the hustle culture normalizing three jobs to afford food and shelter. Mortality makes your life mean something but death in itself is meaningless. It is cruel and random. It’s the life that matters, not the moment it ceases.Take that hammer for your brothers and sisters, remember however gooey you feel inside is the same solubility everyone always feels shifting inside, and it is that persistent threat of dissolution and navigating the slick tumbleweed in each of us that makes us human, that keeps the poets employed. The confusion of being alive is paramount to the human condition, and the clinical precision of ai obfuscates the beauty of being alive with other people. If you prick us we bleed! Heaven is each other, etc. Reject binary codes and techno-fascist yes-men. I’ll show you my ooz and you might see yourself in the leaking I can’t contain. Maybe we can ooze together in a Francis Bacon, Queer (2024) sort of way.

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i could get ā€œThe Kissā€ by Gustav Klimt tattooed across my whole torso, reaching from chest to back, wrapping around me like the vulnerability could warm me too, the way i subtly, mentally lean into the warmth of the artists hand as she holds onto me for stability. there’s something about the piece that expresses a softness, and rawness that i could cleanly slit my chest open for. i know the piece is generic and the only thing people think of when people say klimt but for a good reason i think. and ill never get.Ā 
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i’m so worried for the future. while i try to just live in the present, iā€˜m afraid ill never be able to really make it in any art, and it will just be relegated to hobby. i’ve always been an artist, i’ve been writing, and painting, singing, and acting since i was a child. there’s nothing i feel more deeply in my bones than artistry. there is nothing i feel defines me more, i am full of an insatiable providence to engage and really make something. i don’t care what it is, if it’s music, or acting in films, or physical art, i an ordained to act as a vessel for things to be seen. but i understand, its not a career of value, or the industry is competitive, and it breaks my heart to think i may never be able to fully commit myself to it all.
already, i find myself making exceptions, applying as a film studies major, because it would be more versatile, but still allow me to work closely with those circles. if i can’t be within i can stay close. but i will miss it, sidelined, benched.
i guess i’m in early mourning of a dream.
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okay and I asked the stars and they told me to tell u that u suck 🤷
Jun 21, 2025