i need to really properly think about mine and what they really are but here’s the ones that come to mind
- see lana del rey live
- buy a house, get married and have kids
- go back to japan with a loved one
- buy an obscenely expensive piece of jewellery in a very fancy store
- live as a cowboy for a bit
- drive a very large ship
- also find a job i want to do for the rest of my life that interests and fulfils me and solidifies my ideas on the meaning of life
Mar 2, 2025
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Omg i think i was a cowboy in a past life cause i also yearn for beans and jeans on the frontier
eatgraeps we should both pursue our dreams of clinky boots and dramatic saloon door kicking
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i just wanna get paid for creative expression for the rest of my life. make enough money to have two dogs, a garden, and a cool house to live with my friends in. no kids, no marriage, just chillin’, travelin’ the world, makin’ shit
Feb 7, 2024
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I wanna be rockstar, I wanna direct porn, I wanna own a cinema, i wanna own a diner, I’ll name it after me, and I’ll put little vhs TVs in every corner (where the angels would normally be) I wanna drive a cab in Vegas Robert de niro style, i wanna lurk at the edges of weddings and document all the love around me , and get paid for witnessing something so profoundly special. I wanna make movies. I wanna get beat up at least once. I wanna be a social worker but I’d take that shit home with me. I could work with addicts even though I’d just be doing it to pretend I could fix mom and dad. I wanna be adoooooooooooooooooooored
I wanna get married and have lots of kids, I’ll make em my little tribe , and when they piss me off I’ll make em tend to the crops and gardens adorning our god-given glorious property. son, you git yer fawkin behind outside and pick us some goddamn blueberries! I wanna have lots of windows and live in a house , a real one, not a trailer or a converted shed. I wanna turn tricks, and I wanna have wings. I wish I could have afforded to go to film school
I wish mom got me braces when I was little, and I wish people didn’t look at my teeth. I wish grandma didn’t overdose after being sober for over a decade. i wish I felt like I had a future at all
I wish that doing the dishes didn’t make me cry
And I wish that I didn’t feel small
Apr 23, 2024
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i’m getting a promotion at work effective september ☺ it’s really nice bc this is the first job i’ve had that i’ve liked (even if the pay and hours aren’t great) as its adjacent to the arts and not retail or food (i’ve done it all and those sort of jobs were detrimental to my mental health). also i need the moola bad. that’s basically all that’s making sense right now.
outside of that, i have no idea what’s going on…i'm very much coasting through life but not in a chill cruise control sort of way. not to be THAT person, but the astrology for my birth chart (mainly my gemini sun) warned of stagnation, taking things slow and lower energy. i’m very much feeling the lower energy but i have a plethora of things i want to work on.
i have so many ideas for paintings and drawings and writing but i can’t wrap my head around any of it right now. feeling almost imposter syndrome-like but i don't like that term and it doesn’t quite describe how i’m feeling. i’m also really antsy for some changes in scenery ☹
gonna do my best to try and get out the house more. i set a goal for myself to make a new friend or two before the end of the year <3 so that’s that, goal setting, pay raise, creating (hopefully soon), trying to stay afloat and reading the stars…
Aug 13, 2024
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just quit my new job i hate, over text message, four minutes before my shift.
here’s to never seeing rachel again 🥂
Mar 2, 2025
Mar 14, 2025
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dawned on me that most ppl on here are american so hope everyone reads everything i write in a british accent 🤞
Feb 11, 2025