Because something has broken in my brain since I last responded to it where Iām a lot less restrained and passive; Iāve leaned into my creativity and passionate nature and have become more of an active participant in seeking what I wantā¦ a little less controlled, a little more chaotic. Very interesting
Feb 16, 2025
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Lately Iāve been diving headfirst into things Iād usually ignore. random creative ideas, new communities, reading things Iād usually scroll past. Not all of it makes sense, but something about the mess feels electric. Itās not clarity, but itās motion. And sometimes thatās all you need to shake things up.
PS: Just personal stuff, not work.
May 5, 2025
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Thereās so much static and bullshit thatās not in my head anymore. My vision is clear. My mind is moving a million miles an hour, buzzing with the electricity of the good kind of āwhat if?ā. Light and creativity flow through me. I know who I am. Years of work finally paying off.
Apr 23, 2025
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Iām not going to call this gifted kid burnout which I think is often just a symptom of the popping of the bubble of peopleās confused delusions of grandeur because they didnāt realize that gifted education programs are at best a way of giving specialized and individualized education, and at worst a way of achieving legal segregation in schools.
Not to brag, but my therapist who specialized in EMDR therapy for treating people with trauma told me that I had the most difficult childhood of anyone she had ever treated. It was also filled with beauty and I was encouraged in my many skills and pursuits early on, but the inner rot of compounded repeated traumas, keeping secrets, and hiding my suffering eventually took hold.
I was always a good student but as things at home intensified I cared less and less. A teacher noticed this and tried to take advantage of my vulnerable state. This made matters more complicated for me because still to this day heās my favorite teacher that I ever had; he taught me much of what I know about writing and helped me to develop my skills.
After that, I spent my time in school just coasting along, putting in the minimal amount of effort to no fail. I had no goals or ambition. After graduation, I flitted from service job to service job. I started seeing my therapist and thinking about what I actually wanted to do.
I realized I had one exceptional skill which could be monetized to my advantage and I threw myself into it, grinding to make a living and improve my station in life. This worked and I live in decent material comfort, but Iāve realized the lifestyle I always thought I wanted isnāt what I want at all, so Iām reevaluating that and beginning to explore what that looks like.
There are several different exciting paths of progression my career could take, but Iām also finally working on creative projects for the first time in about a decade, so Iām going to see where life takes me. My best friend tells me I should become certified as a yoga teacher, and going back to school to study psychology and become a therapist would also be tight. I would love to seek a second career.
It took me a long time to get here but Iām trying to actualize and find purposeā¦ Something something Maslowās hierarchy of needs.
May 26, 2024
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My dad teases me about how when I was a little kid, my favorite thing to do when I was on the landline phone with somebodyābe it a relative or one of my best friendsāwas to breathlessly describe the things that were in my bedroom so that they could have a mental picture of everything I loved and chose to surround myself with, and where I sat at that moment in time. Perfectly Imperfect reminds me of that so thanks for always listening and for sharing with me too š
Feb 23, 2025
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Iāve been thinking about how much of social media is centered around curating our self-image. When selfies first became popular, they were dismissed as vain and vapidāa critique often rooted in misogynyābut now, the way we craft our online selves feels more like creating monuments.
We try to signal our individuality, hoping to be seen and understood, but ironically, I think this widens the gap between how others perceive us and who we really are. Instead of fostering connection, it can invite projection and misinterpretationāpreconceived notions, prefab labels, and stereotypes. Worse, individuality has become branded and commodified, reducing our identities to products for others to consume.
On most platforms, validation often comes from how well you can curate and present your imageāselfies, aesthetic branding, and lifestyle content tend to dominate. High engagement is tied to visibility, not necessarily depth or substance. But I think spaces like PI.FYI show that thereās another way: where connection is built on shared ideas, tastes, and interests rather than surface-level content. Itās refreshing to be part of a community that values thoughts over optics.
By sharing so few images of myself, Iāve found that it gives others room to focus on my ideas and voice. When I do share an image, it feels intentionalāsomething that contributes to the story I want to tell rather than defining it. Sharing less allows me to express who I am beyond appearance.
For women, especially, sharing less can be a radical act in a world where the default is to objectify ourselves. It resists the pressure to center appearance, focusing instead on what truly matters: our thoughts, voices, and authenticity. Iāve posted a handful of pictures of myself in 2,500 posts because I care more about showing who I am than how I look.
In trying to be seen, are we making it harder for others to truly know us? Itās a question worth considering.
Dec 27, 2024
Schedule sent my resignation email for the morning, effective immediately ā
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Feb 27, 2025