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oscar wilde said, "If you want to be a grocer, or a general, or a politician, or a judge, you will invariably become it; that is your punishment. If you never know what you want to be, if you live what some might call the dynamic life but what I will call the artistic life, if each day you are unsure of who you are and what you know you will never become anything, and that is your reward."
i remind myself of this quote every time i get jealous of my friends who have it all figured out.
Feb 1, 2025
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a recent discovery of mine is that only so often will you be punished for making the wrong life decisions
there are times where i get completely hung up on two decisions that both seem like good decisions, but despite this abundance of awesome decisions the only thing i get out is misery in being unable to choose ...
i think that part of maturing is realising the easiest way to make yourself happy in this situation is to just choose one and remind yourself that, even if the other decision ends up better, firstly you're not even gonna know (lol) and secondly you can't underestimate your willpower to make the most out of the hand you've been dealt. i'm not saying ability deliberately - i'm saying willpower - but at the end of the day having that will is more important than whether or not you can pull it off in the new and mysterious situation you may find yourself in. this way you open yourself up to actually making these decisions and #ReapingTheJoy because you can't do so the longer you worry!
May 5, 2025
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I think continually asking why you want something can help with this. When you do, you may realize the ”it” you want is rooted in other people: how they’ll perceive you, if you’ll be accepted by them, etc. The older I’ve gotten I’ve been better at untangling some of my desires from the ego and I think it has lead to better self-satisfaction of where I am at and where I am going. it’s also allowed me to ”let go” of some dreams. That’s sounds negative or sad but I don’t mean it so: sometimes you white-knuckle-grip an idea of yourself so hard that it destroys you! I think ”letting go” doesn’t mean things won’t happen, it means they don’t have to and that pressure alleviation can make all the difference.
That’s not to say to never let the drive of the ego take over…I’m not sure we would create art/great things without it. I guess what I’m saying is that knowing the root of our desires is a key to balance and self-assuredness.
Feb 18, 2025
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reinvention for the sake of reinvention is silly. I'm sure you're a cool person as is, and change and growth are good, but you shouldn't throw the baby out with the bathwater and just randomize a new set of hobbies and personality traits and whole vibe...
figure out what values you're committed to, figure out what you like about yourself, figure out what traits you value in others... explore, meet people, learn from their perspectives, keep an open mind, try new things. Explore art in different media--it doesn't have to be fine portraits and sculptures... sometimes you just go from being a TV person to being a movie person and movies start to give you new perspectives.
but don't just pick up personality traits ad-hoc. keep a focus on who you want to be and stay directed towards that goal. explore, but don't get distracted, don't get lost.
Apr 18, 2024
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this idea of "you don't owe anyone anything" came about through the social media therapists that try to diagnose complete strangers with a multitude of issues and complexes. all it has done has made selfish people more selfish and divided us as a community.
you do not owe everyone everything, but if you consider yourself part of a community, a society, you do owe everyone something. at a base level you owe people kindness, respect (as long as they haven't lost the right to it), and basic human decency. you owe your loved ones even more.
stop being selfish and rude in the name of treating your so-called "people pleasing."
Feb 4, 2025
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if one more person tells me to turn one of my hobbies into a business i'm gonna go berserk. is nothing sacred in this late stage capitalist hellscape?
Feb 3, 2025
i swear to god it's upside down and it makes me giggle every time i see it. pls tell me you see it too and i'm not crazy. i love it.
Mar 24, 2025