- podcasts (I like the broski report and the basement yard)
- being around animals: go to dog parks, cat cafes, or just pet random animals that you walk past on the street
- meditation (sit quietly, deep breaths, calming music)
- social media (here, instagram, discord) start sending stuff to your old friends online if it’s too much to hang in person
I hope you feel better. I’ve been in a situation very similar to yours and I understand completely. It is so difficult to have to distance yourself from others when you still feel that loneliness. But, since you’re feeling better now, please please please start putting yourself out there again. I promise you that your friends still love you and want to be around you. But you have to be the one to bridge that gap that you created. I hope this helped :)
Jan 8, 2025
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As someone who is maybe 2ish connections removed from the situation Im assuming you may be referring to… I am so deeply sorry 💔 hope you know that there are many strangers out there who are rooting for you and think you deserve to be happy and treated well, despite being strangers …
As someone who has been through a lot of heartbreak, the advice already given in previous comments is really great . I think in my experience, having 1 or 2 friends that you know really love you and get you, that you can spend time with even if you are really sad and not contributing much, was helpful. If you feel the need to talk about your feelings try to keep it to those people, or a journal. Once you start to feel a little better going out with more people and being more social can really help remind you of what is valuable about YOU.. what YOU enjoy and bring to the world..
Above all it helped me to remind myself that life is going to go on. You will move on, no matter how long it might take. It might feel like the worst thing in the world but i promise you will get through it. It’s just a matter of time :) be kind to yourself while time passes. I cant emphasize enough how deeply I have felt so heartbroken I thought I couldnt go on. Multiple times. Yet here I am.. and you will be okay too ❤️
Mar 3, 2024
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Start a long binge worthy show, watch that and distract yourself.
I do believe in the fact that you gotta go through it somehow but distracting yourself is not running away from your problems if you are at a safe space like your own home where you can weep and cry freely.
Definitely talk to some casual friends that you very rarely see about the breakup. I know that might seem odd but talking to people I rarely see rather than my best friends that I see very often helped me keep their name out of my mouth and that helped keep them out of my mind.
Go to new places, discover. Adventure out alone and cry at different places, you are going to be sad no matter what, why not change the scenery.
I chose to distract myself most of the time in order to avoid getting depressed so I laid off the sad music and listened to podcasts for a while. I recommend Emergency Intercom!!
And if you want, pick up tennis or some other physical activity that you can channel your anger and feelings through.
Aug 21, 2024
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I like to remember that time is on your side, it will get easier as time goes by just for nature of it. So focusing on going through the day-to-day the best you can while being kind to yourself and letting the days past is what helped me.
It’s not easy, you have to go through the grief to come up on the other side.
But stick with the things that make your present more bearable and you WILL come up on the other side.
For me it was doing things for myself: listening to music, visiting close friends, cooking for myself, going on walks on nature, spending time alone and bored and finding new things I liked and enjoying my own company was life changing.
The loneliness is rough but it can be a great teacher (at least I like to think something had to come out of all that pain).
I guess it really depends on the break up the narratives you are telling yourself right now, but if you can be mindful about them, observe them, and let go of trying to understand and control everything they get less cruel. Right now you just need to survive and receive some kindness, later on you can build the story around it (Without the fog of the pain around it).
And for the love of god cut contact with them, their family and friends, at least for a while. rebuild yourself outside their zone of influence. Show vulnerability if you can, it can bring great support and lending ears, BE KIND TO YOURSELF (although have in mind sometimes over indulgence is not kind).
You will get through it, time is on your side.
Apr 18, 2024
Top Recs from @altonbrownsrightfoot53
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I recommend it.
Jan 11, 2025
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I have have grown up listening to Dylan my entire life. Not all of his music, but damn near close. To me, it feels like a perfect sad hug. It may not make me feel better, but I'll feel less alone. But whenever I play his music in front of my friends they just don't get it. They look at me funny and I can tell they don't like it. I love my friends, and I think that they all have great music taste most of the time but now I'm embarrassed and wondering if I got caught up in the aesthetic of the music and he actually just doesn't translate that well decades later.
Jan 6, 2025
Completely instrumental and improvisational jazz, blues and funk fusion. Its a cornerstone of African psychedelic rock in my opinion. I highly recommend listening to Minlbelesh and avoiding Bati Bati.
Jan 7, 2025