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My fitted sheet shrank in the wash.
Every time I try to pull the last corner down another one pings off the bed.
I am Sisyphus, these sheets are my rock.
I cannot rest until my work is done.
I try to make my bed, at least I will never lie in it.
God laughs.
Jan 6, 2025
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A secondary supporting leg on our bed breaks while we’re having sex. We stop and I retreat to my study as he begins sliding the king mattress off of the bed to look at the damage. He tells me, I need an Allen wrench—a declarative statement, not a request. I keep one in my desk just in case; I retrieve it and hand it to him within seconds. I recline in silent repose on my sofa, reflecting.
He calls me back in and we get back into bed. I’m going to try to ease back into it. He tells me that a screw is bent but It’s good for now. I know he wants me to say okay, yay, or to stop talking at all, but I can’t help myself, and I ask: well, what does that mean? He laughs in exasperation and clutches his face with his hands, shaking his head as if he should have expected this.
Every night, he tightens the screw before he goes to sleep, and every night, the leg bends in on itself again under the strain, right back where we started.
On our anniversary, I accompany him to buy a screw and watch as he huffs and puffs and struggles and whines. I abandon him to walk through the store and he calls me on the phone when he’s done.
The leg is securely in place again, and all I can think about is how much longer every other leg can hold.
Feb 25, 2025
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I shall lie down at home
and pretend to be dying.
Then the neighbours will all come in
to gape at me, and, perhaps, she will come with them.
When she comes, I won't need a doctor,
she knows why I am ill.
May 4, 2024
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I'm writing this under three blankets. This is my nest. I am a bird.
Feb 1, 2024
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I went to bars by myself just to read and listen to the music. I learned recently that’s the freedom you gain when you go places alone.
I spend so much of my life unintentionally waiting for permission to do things. Waiting on someone else to want to do things with me. It’s sort of weird being an adult and being allowed to just go to another country because you feel like it. It’s a freedom that I’ve never been brave enough to explore before.
I wonder if this experience was a as weird and wonderful for anyone else as it was for me.
(img: sketch of a cathedral i went to on my solo trip)
Jan 18, 2025
Guys no one tells you but it’s actually kind of easy to cheer yourself up if you just focus on the little things.
Yesterday I had a horrible day lined up, full of jobs and meetings :( so I wore my favourite shoes. Everyone tells me they're ugly but they make me happy!
Jan 30, 2025
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Was thinking today about how wild it is that most people attending public school in Scotland are required to learn cultural dances. And then most of the pubs in towns and village will host a dance every month or so? And we can all just go and do our dances because everyone knows them? And it’s super cool and sociable?
Isn’t that fun?!! (I love ceilidhs)
Jan 14, 2025