I went on a date recently and listened to this song the day of and now when I listen to it, it reminds of the wonderful night we had :) We are, I think the same person. But I won't get ahead of myself... I hope...
Nov 16, 2024

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a couple weeks ago, i bumped into a friend that i say hi to every now and then, but donā€™t know much about. iā€™ve always thought heā€™s cute. we were both walking to the library to study, so we were talking and getting to know each other. i mentioned that i want to live back at home after i graduate uni because i would miss my dog (and parents) too much. then i showed him my lock screen of my dog. this song was playing (important!) and he stared at the screen for awhile and i thought that was strange because it wasnā€™t hard to see the pic of my dog. my delulu self thought he was trying to read the song name to listen to it later. we ended up spending the rest of the day together, studying, trying to get to know each other while flirting, and then got taco bell for dinner (literally a date yk). he also paid for my drink at our campus cafešŸ„¹ 2 weeks ago, we were studying together again and i asked if he had spotify. he said yes, and i said that we should make a shared playlist that blends our music (i listen to it every day). the other day this song showed up and on the side it had both of our profilesā€¦ basically we both had listened to it, and itā€™s SO CUTE because he is so observant and makes an effort to get to know me. and no i donā€™t think he alr knew who caroline polachek is based on what he listen to. anyway i really really like him and this might be the start of a love story pls wish me luckšŸ¤žšŸ»
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i felt so wiped i considered cancelling the first date i scheduled with a girl. but i made a couple cups of coffee, showered, powered through. and we collaged the whole night away, talking and laughing and staying up til we fell asleep together on my couch at 5AM. her voice is so lovely. i havenā€™t felt so Myself with someone new in so long.
Mar 15, 2024
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Backstory: Im crushing so hard on a tattoo artist near my job and am delusionally convinced sheā€™s my soulmate. We coincidentally have matching tattoos of the cover art for faces by mac miller high on the thigh. (for full story go look at my asks) Update: aightā€¦ went to the tattoo shopā€™s 8th anniversary event just to kinda be present and participate in the art community in Puerto Rico bc Iā€™m having trouble finding ppl I relate too and I think I can make friends w them. Didnā€™t rly get to chat with her much, she was being a little distant and I wasnā€™t going to corner her or anything. I ended up getting some flash that was super cool. after my tat was finished late that night I went for a walk to shake off the nerves of the pain n shit. Ended up getting a strange feeling to buy a bunch of ice creams for everyone in the tattoo shop party so I walked far as hell and bought like 20-30 ice creams from a 24hr bodega and came back to pass them out to everyone for free. Boom. wonderful success and made so many ppl smile. Now the shop owner n community know me and recognize my chill. Additionally: I could not get this girl out of my head. Like I never rly date and I fr donā€™t like talking to girls. Im rly hyper-isolated but itā€™s my own doing. But she Was driving me crazy. I ended up buying her the Book of Mac memoir and planned to give it to her as a gift/tip at our booked tattoo session. I had a feeling that sheā€™d rly like it. But that wasnā€™t enough. I became manic and over the course of three sessions I made her a mac miller mix. Ive attached it for u all to listen. This mightā€™ve been overkill and I was second guessing it the whole time but I did it anyway because Iā€™m not a pussy. Finally: get to the tat session and was greeted with a kiss on the cheek (polite and customary for Puerto Ricans but she was rly friendly about it and she initiated). When she finished setting up our station I sit down and pull out the book. Inside the book I had written to: (her name) from: (me) and a short quote from BMO (adventure time) because it kinda just felt right. tell her hey I got this for you, I think I have a crush on you idk, but yeah this is for you. Bruhā€¦ she melted. She was like soooooooooooo happy. She had a mask on cuz she was sick but she said underneath she was blushing super hard. we start the tattoo and I ask if I can just talk to her while she does it. Iā€™m rly shy and not the best at convo but throughout the entire tattoo I just picked her brain to try and get to know her. Bruhā€¦ we r so alike. Like mind blowingly alike. Talked about music and movies and clothes. But she was kinda dry and quick w her chatting. It took a while for her to warm up a bit and relax. Plus Iā€™m funny so she was giggling after every other thing I said. Teased her a bit. Flirted a bit. But nothing too heavy. By the end of the tattoo session we were on aux together going back and forth w songs talking about why we like them n stuff. Like at this point I can tell weā€™re friends. Finally the tat is finished and itā€™s great. Sheā€™s an apprentice and not super experienced but it was exactly what I wanted. As we were saying our goodbyes she thanks me again for the book. I told her I had one more thing to give her but she had to give me her number firstā€¦ she freaks out a little bit. I say no pressure obviously, but sheā€™s like ā€œyes pressureā€œ Iā€™m like what?? She gives me her number and gives me a super quick and tight hug. Idk how to describe it but it was like a shy, fast ā€œI need to hug you before anyone seesā€ hug. as Iā€™m walking out the shop I text her the link to the mix n head home. I get home, she texts saying thanks for the mix that itā€™s rly cool and thanks again for the book. and thenā€¦. She tells me sheā€™s dating someone šŸ„“ and didnā€™t know how to tell me in person and froze when I asked for her number n if its alright if weā€™re just friends. I ate that punch, said hey no prob we can be friends, which is totally fine like I fr donā€™t mind, but the thing is I KNOW MY WHOLE SCHEME WORKED. Like the way she was reacting to me and how comfortable she got and how cool our convo was like I know she recognized how cool I was. And she told me I was rly cool like she texted saying she thinks im cool. So likeā€¦ fuck. Idk. and She didnā€™t even say she has a boyfriend, she just said sheā€™s dating someone so it doesnā€™t even sound serious. Idk what to do. She didnā€™t respond to my last text. so this is where we stand. I think I fucked her world up tho. No way sheā€™s not thinking about me now. What do yall think?
Jul 19, 2024

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Got into them a couple years ago and laid in my bed one too many times imagining scenarios of me in Australia (never been) where my musician BF played me one of his songs off this album.. Motel, Egg Beater are among my favorites from an album which contains tracks that are comparably brilliant in their ability to place me at ease. I listen to it occasionally when I want to be transported back in time, and though I do this with roughly 55% of what I consume, I think this album is especially good at it :)
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