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And I no longer feel bad about it!! Everyone has different needs and it’s unnecessary to put value judgements on it. Real friends will understand and respect your needs. I’ve also accepted that it’s ok to prioritize types of socializing that create what feels like authentic connection to me (ex. hanging out with 1-3 close friends at a time vs. going to parties where I know I’ll be making an effort to mask). And I let myself leave events as soon as I’m not having fun!!! I like to think that at every party there’s someone else trying to leave early and I’m giving them permission to do so by being the first to dip 🤝 tl;dr : you do you 💛
Aug 18, 2024
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❤️I’ve had sprinkles of acquaintances and light friendships with people over the years that I sometimes feel bad about losing touch with. But sometimes it’s nearly impossible to keep in touch with everyone and still have time to care for yourself and your core people. I’ve tried to stop apologizing for that and just try to let people know I appreciate them from afar. I feel like the older I get the more intentional I have to be with my time and the more healthy boundaries I need to keep. It may disappoint some, but true friends get it, and there will always be an ebb and a flow as life changes. I also feel like social media has wired us to be so hyper-connected all the time and it’s stressful to live up to the expectation of staying in constant communication with everyone you’ve met and liked. Growing up is realizing you can like and enjoy the company of many people and you may not have the time or energy to extend to everyone you want. (And actually it’s also okay not to want to!) Not everything and every connection can stay the same and I need to constantly remind myself of that. I deserve to make space and time for myself so I can love my people better.
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🎉I do not have to throw myself full force into a friendship
I do not have to give 100%
I can be just acquaintances if I want to
I can deny things I don't like doing
I can set boundaries without feeling bad
I can create relationships I actually enjoy
I can leave behind people who don't respect me
I can meet people halfway and not be expected more than that
I can be free to be tired, busy, needing alone time
I can respond later
I can be allowed to have friends without being a 24/7 hotline
but I'm also allowed to say hi at weird times of the day
I can do anything that works for both of us
I can have a relationship I feel real in without it consuming me
and you can too!!!!!
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🫀i was the first grandchild/cousin, oldest sibling, weird kid etc etc so i know how to make the most of time by myself. and i do value my alone time! but i am very sick of people telling me that i need to learn to enjoy time by myself when i express frustration in not having many friends close by and/or interested in the same things as me.
most of my friends are long distance or simply enjoy different things than me. and thats fine! but it’s also fine for me to want to go to a concert with someone or go to a museum and have someone to talk about the art with. also it’s ok for me to want a romantic smooch or a held hand every once in a while. it does not mean i don’t love myself it just means i am human!
most of my friends are long distance or simply enjoy different things than me. and thats fine! but it’s also fine for me to want to go to a concert with someone or go to a museum and have someone to talk about the art with. also it’s ok for me to want a romantic smooch or a held hand every once in a while. it does not mean i don’t love myself it just means i am human!
5d ago
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