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i think it's a bit of both but mainly notifications... i'm experimenting w only letting myself watch youtube shorts & scroll on pinterest lol.
don't get me wrong, i love looking at content but i'm always mindlessly refreshing apps like instagram just in case someone happens to message me or like my photo? maybe it's a symptom of growing up with an older sister who constantly outshone me so I crave attention as an adult hahaha.
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1) i realized some time ago that alot of social media, with whatever algorithm they use, will try their best to push whats most popular to you. No matter if it’s positive or negative. So while Im on insta, I tend to delete the app and redownload it a day later when I catch them doing that. It’s like a mini reset but not really. But alongside that, i have made the conscious effort not to doomscroll and to dislike and report posts/comments/videos that are willfully harmful and spread misinformation.
2) i look back into the areas where i spent a lot of time online as a child when i didn’t have social media. And that place was Youtube and rewatching comfort shows and finding new outlets that don't trigger me. Sometimes that’s finding people online that only have like 5k subscribers. The other well known site that doesn’t have awful people on there is Pinterest 😂 i never had an awful time on there outside of the ads
3) like i am the child of the house, i limit the content on my phone. On the Iphone at least you can set timers to how long you have been on an app each day and block certain websites.
Jan 19, 2025
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FUCK SOCIAL MEDIA. Im obsessed with it. how could i not be? it seems to be one of the few ways my body can get dopamine other than inhaling burning plants and reading fun facts. So, without warning to my loyal instagram story likers who are probably scared and crying and lost without me (no one noticed), i deleted the apps.
then I went outside. i sat by the river and let the sun do it's thing. boom: phat hit of dopamine. but the real kind. Saw a mama bald eagle and a teen baldie hunting together. boom: thinking about something other than myself. wondering if the teen ate any of his siblings. wondering what the mom will do when he goes off on his own. is she proud of him? do they argue? but then i remember they're birds and dont work like that. just like that im back in my body again, demystified by the impassive nature of birds. ugh. then my hands reached for my phone without thinking. i cursed at myself.
all social media does is distract, because when i try to relax without it, i get antsy from craving other stimuli. but what am i trying to distract myself from? my own thoughts? how sad is that? why cant i just sit somewhere and think for awhile and feel fulfilled?
the sun is still out. birds still flying overhead, and i'm thinking about my need for distraction–– a distraction within itself. this is what social media has done to me. i feel stuck in a big ole sticky spider web called the internet and have no fucking idea where else to satisfy my dopamine addicted brain.
(so anyway, hiiii perfectly imperfecttttt xxoxoxxoxo hope u can help me reestablish my relationship with the interweb? i need a fix from somewhere im a junkie!!!!!!!!!! )
Mar 12, 2025
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the trad social media i use the most is instagram. the main reason I stay on it is that it's kind of how i hear about anything that's going on. that includes all the things that make me go "wow I'm so glad I heard about this thing I can do" but also all the things that make me go "aww man ☹️". been trying to strike a balance with how much of that noise I let into my life right now, so I've been relegating my instagram use to just on my browser on my personal laptop which i leave at home most days.
trying to get back into having a dedicated "screen time" for socials so I can still keep up with things but I'm not just constantly bombarded with notifications and stories and new posts and news and current events and also what my friends are doing and also what local businesses are doing and also what bands and musicians I like are doing and also ADS ADS ADS ADS ALL THE TIME I DONT WANT TO BUY ANY OF THESE LEAVE ME ALLLLOOOONNNE
trying to reclaim my peace of mind and my attention this year. tryna be like this but for the attention economy
Jan 6, 2025
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Some mornings before heading to our office jobs, my neighbor drops by my apartment. I whip up some matcha lattes or other tea concoctions, then we set out to soak up the morning sun while admiring the unique architecture of our neighborhood. Sometimes, we team up to order groceries online and even take turns cooking dinner for each other. Tonight, I'm preparing a vegan bolognese, and last weekend, he gave me some peanut noodles. It's like having a friend on speed dial bahaha
Mar 31, 2024
took this picture in japan from my aunt's old apartment. i find it hard take random pictures in the US just because i don't think anything is special around me / i don't want to "waste" film. but when i'm in Japan it's so easy to find the beauty in the everyday environment.. even something as simple as people walking upstairs and a guy biking along a path...
Mar 30, 2024
my friend threw a halloween party and i drew everyone i remembered on a tote bag and gave it to him as a bday gift. now all our other friends are mad jealous and it's the talk of the town
Feb 7, 2024