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when someone asks you literally anything:
- Did you get a haircut?
- That's what people been saying
- Are you working tomorrow?
- That's what people been saying yea
- Are your parents divorced?
- That's what people been saying!
Nov 26, 2023
Related Recs
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Lately whenever the homies in shiesties pull up on my subway car and start their "showtime" routine i like to pretend to clutch my pearls and at the end turn to someone and say "what was that all about?"
Some other good whiteism you can try out on your friends and in the workplace:
"did you get your steps in?"
"theres more than one way to skin a cat!"
"im thinking of moving upstate"
"my mom is my best friend"
3d ago
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Someone does something you think is dumb / tacky / a bad decision — “That makes so much sense for you”
Friend doesn’t want to spend money at a bar, asks to pregame outside a liquor store — “No if I was poor I’d be doing the same thing”
Someone mentions something (like a movie or restaurant) and asks if anyone likes it when you know it’s clearly bad, toss someone under the bus — “You should ask Jeff, he tends to like things like that”
Someone asks if the cake they baked was bad because they’re self conscious about it — “I mean I wouldn’t say it was good” or “if I was you I’d never make this again”
Jun 8, 2024
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my wife recently told me I use this one a lot, usually as a response to statements like ”this person is awful to work with but I know they have been through a lot”
Apr 8, 2025
Top Recs from @vikushavas
why would i wear a nude band-aid when i can wear a cookie monster band-aid. these walked so starface pimple patches could run
Jan 31, 2025
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...and making peace with that. Been in the biggest reading slump because I wasn't vibing with The Idiot by Elif Batuman but desperately wanted to push through bc it got shortlisted for Pulitzer. 65% in, I just had to admit it wasn't for me and abandon it. Flying through books I've been wanting to read now and feeling so much better about myself :)
Nov 29, 2024
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been saving soooo much mental energy
Feb 10, 2025