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Instead of trying to schedule meetings, I’ve taken to going for a standing weekly or bi-weekly. Scheduling is replaced by skipping for the week. This works because I have a bunch of long term projects with collaborators right now, but it’s also nice because many of these people are friends of mine, so even if we don’t have updates we can just take the hour to catch up. This practice has bled into social life; I’ve now got a handful of monthly dinner dates in rotation.
May 17, 2022
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I like having scheduled plans, so I always try to plan hangouts. There are some friends that flake, which bothers me; I understand that things come up, but if flaking is a regular thing, then I feel unimportant and that you're not making an effort. If a friend flakes, I expect them to put in effort in rescheduling a hangout.
I also attend community events for things I enjoy (yoga, reading, dance, etc.). Maybe friends come; maybe I go solo and meet new people. Either way, there's a social interaction.
Bc I WFH too, I've been trying to reach out to other WFH friends to see if we could WFH together. And/or WFH at a cafe (consistency probably helps - i.e. going to the same cafe rather than always changing it up) to meet other WFH peeps.
I'm still trying to find my community.
May 15, 2025
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Everyone is busy. Everyone is booked up. It has become to new norm to fill my Google Calendar with dinner plans and late-night events, fully scheduled two to three weeks in advance. Resisting this adult timetable, drop-in culture still exists with a bit more brute force, it's texting beloved besties that I'm around the corner—can I come over for a coffee or a chat?—then breezing through on to my errand of the day or whatever else I have going on.
Sep 18, 2024
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I definitely feel like this sometimes but most nights I do loveeeee being alone (in front of the TV). To answer your question, I’ve found that socialization ebbs and flows. The most regularly I was seeing all my friends is when we had standing weeknight meetups like trivia on Tuesdays, watching a show together on Wednesdays, etc. My personal sweet-spot for “spontaneous” plans is 2-4 days in advance. I’d text something like “Having a hard week! Let’s do something fun this weekend” then you can gauge from there :) Trivia is a really good one though it brings people out of the woodwork.
May 15, 2025
Top Recs from @ariaelise
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Not supposed to blow this one up but idk - since college my friends have been on the camel crush wave; in a way, the surf n turf of cigarettes. No one is asking you to crush it but I dare you not to. Just the end though. RIP thanks to the FDA.
May 17, 2022
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as a music focused tween I thought british accents were hot. I am in London right now. They aren’t. Also people give you too much information about stuff. I get it. that said, it’s warmer here than nyc right now.
Feb 4, 2024
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I know some really lovely English people.
Feb 4, 2024