everything i am, everything i like and value in life is in direct opposition to how i was raised! small town cool kids are much cooler than big town kids, all the odds were against us and we had to fight for our own identities. plus, we grew up around trees 🌳🍃
Acting nonchalant and aloof to try to seem cool is a tradition among teenagers dating back to ancient times! There are bible verses where a mother wonders why her sons can’t be more like that David boy who slew a giant. (no there aren’t) But I agree with you that it’s worrisome these days when there aren‘t many paths to economic security that don’t require putting effort into education. Something I realized decades after high school was the small group of kids playing Dungeons and Dragons at school were really onto something! They were a close group who did something creative together even though the rest of the school looked down on them.
earlier i was all mopey (reading yeats’ “the second coming” & everything) but zoned out because some tiny happy children down the road were playing some sport & chanting for all of their friends. thank u tiny happy children!!!!!!
But I am kind of a goober with the most boring job on the planet just objectively speaking (luckily it gives me freedom to do other fun things in my spare time like writing and making stuff like a podcast and now YouTube gameplay videos). You can see a recommended post below this one entitled Well to read about my prior career aspirations. Teen me would probably be disappointed but it’s okay. I finally own a dog like I wanted. I have clear skin, boobs, and the ability to talk to people now which I never thought would happen. i live somewhere green and rainy instead of the sunny desert! I did also get to fulfill my attention-seeking childhood dream of being on TV because I’m a hair model for a local salon owner and we did a spot on the morning news (lol). I have very nice hair in general all the time for this same reason which was something I always dreamed of as a reckless serial DIY hair cutter/colorer. Editing to add that I also wanted to die tragically young of tuberculosis and fall in love in the sanatorium. or to be like Emily Dickinson and live by myself next to a cemetery writing to myself but feared having my imaginary future writing shared posthumously without my consent like Kafka. But look at me now I can’t stop posting so I think I failed at the whole mysterious hermit thing (though I am relatively solitary)
what is happening to people? is everybody taking dumb bitch juice? why is chatgpt such a big thing in peoples lives right now? what happened to curiosity, eagerness to learn and the joy of figuring out the answers for youself? help!!!!!
