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i love taking psychic damage looking at the ceiling while waiting for my pastrami to find you’re sitting a table over from the director of a movie you watched a few summers ago with a dear art hoe friend from college
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Jun 30, 2025

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I went to see much-recommended Nosferatu today. The ticket taker told me theater 8, just like she told the people ahead of me, so that’s where I went. I sit in my seat H4 and before the show someone sits in H5. Im wondering why this person bought the seat next to me. Then someone sits in H3 and I’m thinking maybe we all bought tix at the same time. Then all the previews are horror movies. Then finally the movie starts on a sunny day in LA where a diner waitress is getting off the night shift and I’m thinking this is interesting! And then the title comes up One of Them Days and I feel silly for wondering about these people on either side of me. I stayed and watched and it’s a fun movie!
Jan 21, 2025
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i love popcorn as much as the next guy, but it’s time to leave 15 dollar mediums in the past. last week i brought a thick as hell italian sandwich to a 12:30 showing of “I’m Still Here,” and it was gone before the trailers ended. Let me give you a breakdown. Baguette: cut in half and ripped open with my bare hands. Salami, capicolla, maybe some mortadella if i’m feeling crazy. Provolone, lettuce, onion, and a little olive oil and vinegar if they are easily accessible (mine was made in a trader joe’s parking lot.) Might even offer a bit to the guy sitting 3 rows in front of me. The movie theater sandwich awakens something in you. You become a new person by the time it’s done.
Feb 12, 2025
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I accidentally sat in the perfect seat at the movies a few days ago. To be honest I can’t recommend it. it's ruined my life and made me into a monster. I'm uncovering neuroses they write Curb episodes about. To anyone planning to see a movie with me soon: I'm so sorry. I'm so so sorry. But I’m embracing the darkness.
Dec 27, 2023

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america is crumbling, institutions are failing, slashes in the safety net are windfalls to billionaires & defense contractors, and federal forces are brutally terrorizing my neighbors, my city, and my state - but at least i retain the freedom to give myself a tummy ache from eating too much candy
Jul 14, 2025