What @MOSSYELFIE said but also for your coffee shop dilemma, order decaf. Even if it's not on the menu they all usually have it. Or get a hot chocolate, or an orange juice, or a soda, or a pastry. You can still go to your coffee meet ups and get a little treat. I know the importance of meeting up for coffee. You could also suggest a different place tho, usually I feel like a dessert is a good stand in. Boba, fro-yo, ice cream, cookie shop, bagels, that sort of thing.
