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a wonderful idea expressed by Colin Miller when I interviewed him. "I prefer it when things are open-ended and have multiple meanings… I feel like things are hyper literal right now. It’s fun to make meaningful nonsense."
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May 16, 2025

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absurdism is the idea that life has no inherent meaning, and humans struggle because we keep searching for meaning in a meaningless universe. Albert Camus’ paradox called ā€œthe absurdā€œ: we crave meaning but the universe gives us none. the desire for purpose and the silent indifferent world. the illusion of control is about believing we have power over things we dont. its comforting to think our choices shape everything. both ideas challenge the notion that we can impose order on life. criticisms: 1. it contradicts itself absurdism claims life has no inherent meaning, yet cramus argues we should embrace the absurd in order to live fully. But isnt choosing to embrace life a kind of meaning? if rejecting meaning is itself a meaningful choice doesn't that contradict the core idea? 2. it underestimates human nature humans naturally seek meaning, pattern, and purpose. absurdism suggests that ignoring or resisting this drive isnt realistic. if meaning is something we need, can we truly live without it, or is absurdism just an intellectual stance that doesn't hold up in everyday life questions i have: 1. is accepting the absurd truly freeing, or just another way of coping? - Camus says we should embrace the absurd and live anyway, but is that just another ā€œmeaningā€ we create to make existence tolerable? 2. If control is an illusion, how do we explain personal responsibility? -if we dont really have control, dose that mean we’re not responsible for our actions? or is there still some level of agency within chaos? 3. whats the difference between embracing absurdism and nihilism? -nihilism says ā€œnothing mattersā€ while absurdism says ā€œnothing matters… so live anyway.ā€ but is that really enough of a distinction? or is absurdism just a more optimistic version of nihilism? 4. dose meaning exist outside of human perception? -if we, as humans, disappeared, would ā€œmeaningā€ cease to exist? or is meaning something bigger than us, even if we can’t understand it?
Feb 20, 2025
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i've been wrestling with this idea for a little while let me know if you have any insight i'm fascinated by the idea of true belief. i want it, i admire it, i respect it. i also think it is scary and it can cause so much damage. lately i've been thinking how everything we see we process through our own perception, so all of reality is subjective. we can interact with nothing as it is, but only as we are. if you think about synchronicity too, all meaning projected onto the world becomes valid and true. everything exists only to confirm what you're experiencing. if you believe the phase of the moon being the same at two points in time holds meaning, it does because it's just another part of your mental map. but when it comes to religion and politics it can be so destructive. i wasn't raised with religion but i have always felt myself drawn towards it. i am at the same time very critical of it, especially how the human aspect of organized religion tends to be used for control, but i truly admire true belief. but seeing the results of it, like the persecution of trans people in american politics, is scary and sends me back to the critical mindset. but there's still some appeal i can't shake. what if there were a geocentrist today? someone who worked a normal job, went about an ordinary life, they just happened to believe the earth was at the center of the universe. that's kind of a beautiful thing. if you only draw conclusions from your own experience, of course the earth is at the center. everything seems to orbit around it. and there's still a purity in believing only in what you have found for yourself. the world would live only in their mind, and each world created by each person is all the more precious for being unique and reflective of its individual. i'm just rambling at this point, but what do you guys think? true belief: yes or no?
Mar 12, 2025
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Adorno was 100% right about the occult but, as a practice literary or countercultural, hell, even to see human connection, to produce something, it’s cool! This lecture by Grant Morrison sums it up as a practice to experiment, fair warning, it is aggressively 2000s and fantastically weird, but the energy is palpable, wacky as some of the concepts see to be.
Apr 8, 2024

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