You and Jennie seem amazing so I'm not going to try for vague relationship advice, I hope your friends and family have that covered.
But for the wedding (and honestly big parties in general), plan the shit out of it until the night before, and then don't worry about it anymore. Starting then just enjoy the feelings. You're getting married! To a really cool person! It should be fun! Let the food people handle food and the music people handle the music and trust the groomsmen and bridesmaids to handle the little possible mishaps. Your job is to take in the the people you've gathered and celebrate this new fun part of your life.
(so that's my unsolicited marriage advice from an unmarried young person, bc Matt said I could)
May 15, 2025
Related Recs
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I love love. I love when my friends get engaged and there's the ring and the announcement and everyone is so happy and excited and there's all of the lead up parties and the letters and invitations and the preparations and the nervousness and planning and then the day comes and everyone is all dressed up and they come together to celebrate love and the people that they love and there's tears and marriage and beauty and champagne and photos and little bite sized appetizers and a gorgeous meal and toasts and dancing and beers and love and fun. I love love.
(Congrats Jennie & Ty)
Nov 9, 2023
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Just really consider who you invite because god damn people have no respect (this is not necessarily for @TYLER and is more of just a general bit of advice for anyone getting married)
May 14, 2025
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"Stay hungry and stay foolish" is about the posture of humility, of curiosity, of intentional unknowning.
You think you know her. It's true: you do, enough to get married. But she's complex and marvelous and nearly infinite. Know that you'll never really know everything—but take joy in being a perpetual student of her. Seek to discover, uncover, and be surprised every day. And tomorrow she'll be a little bit different than today and really different in a year. That's wonderful. The she that you married won't be the she in ten years. Endless delights and discovery.
Violently avoid complacency in your marriage. Be comfortable together but avoid getting too comfortable. Don't take her for granted. And if you feel like she's taking you for granted, then tell her you feel that way—say it lovingly, over dinner and with champagne and with a smile—but definitely say something.
Say something. If you can't let it go and forgive it, then you've got to surface it. Mercilessly evict those little offenses, don't let them fester into toxic walls.
You're probably wrong. Keep that in mind. You might think you are definitely right. Well, she also thinks she's definitely right. In every conversation and conflict hold space for the possibility that you are wrong. That way you don't end up being the jerk who can't admit error—or the jerk who lords your rightness over her. Be humble in being wrong and gracious in being right.
Be teachable. You're going to have to be teachable as you enter into this next stage in life and as you move through other stages and expansions that may follow. What's served you well up until this point has been good, but it will be inadequate to take you into the seasons ahead.
Never stop learning. Never fully arrive. Don't plateau.
Be your own person. Let her be her own person. Insist on that. Encourage and protect and fight for her independence—as you at the same time seek to be interdependent.
Need one another! But also don't need one another.
You've got something special now, just the two of you. Protect it. So try not to go to intimate places with others that you can't go with her. Fight for those intimacies.
You've got something special now, so bring others into it. The warmth and community in your own little village of the two of you isn't just for you: it's for the wayward friend, the crying child, the weary stranger. You've got a good thing here. Be generous with it.
You know that thing oft said thing about love (which they'll probably quote at you on your wedding day), that "love is patient and kind and keeps no record of wrongs and always hopes and forgives" and so on, aim for that! Achieving it is impossible, but it's a damn fine target.
You've got this. You’ve got what it takes.
Also: you don't have what it takes! And when you don’t have what it takes, that’s fine too. She might not either. You get to grow together. And that’s the most beautiful part of all.
Good luck! We're rooting for you!
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My cred for offering all of this: I am human. I am here. There was an empty text box and a share button.
May 15, 2025
Top Recs from @moonbeams
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It's so lawless. You’ll see the weirdest things and no one will care. People are so unabashedly human here. Dead expressions, exhaustion, boredom. You’ll get a coffee, someone else will get a bloody mary, the time is irrelevant. Your priorities will be tested, everything costs at least three times as much as it should, it won’t matter. I love liminal spaces.
May 10, 2025
May 6, 2025
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like damn who curated this, these songs are so good, I really know my tastes well
Feb 28, 2025