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today my roommate jack tried to convince me that American cheese was made out of cow squ*rt. and I pondered this for a moment because I literally have no idea what american cheese is made out of. and it was really funny
Apr 3, 2025
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it was move in day at college. my new roommate offered me one of her favorite snacks, a babybel cheese. I had never heard of them before, but trying to make friends, I made a big deal about how they *too* were my favorite snack of all time. first thing I do is bite into the red protective wax, wincing, saying how good it was...she stared at me in shock and told me what I did. Embarrassed and caught, we laughed about it all night.
we lived together for 3 years after that :-)
May 19, 2025
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⭐Never in my life have I ever been able to make a sandwich with American cheese and not shove a slice down my throat. It’s like a reward for making the sandwich. It’s my favorite part.
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🧀does anyone know if this cheese has an actual genre? anyways its great. (try it on sweet potatoes)
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🫖consistently I will ask my friend Jack things that I should be googling, like "if i made a giant batch of chai latte and kept it in the fridge, would it separate?" he said yes, don't do that. I failed to ask if i could just shake it up and it would be fine. i'm gonna text him right now about it i think.
Mar 25, 2025
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Technically I'm not into this just yet, but my friend Morgan is influencing me to stay off my phone and let myself get bored. In her boredom experience, she's been making art out of office supplies, like Spencer from iCarly. Today she made a giant squidward head with masking tape, and a dog statuette out of a screw and some tacks. Yesterday she made a large pair of boobs out of leftover streamers from an event. Who knows what tomorrow will bring.
Apr 17, 2025
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I saw this written in a bathroom stall in Austin TX. I really liked it, so I re-wrote it in a bathroom in Portland ME the other day. I'll probably re-write it somewhere else soon too.
Mar 31, 2025