i had this presentation today at uni, a very normal presentation that i didn’t even have to prepare i just had to explain what i’ve done in this project. I’ve always SUCKED at public speaking, i get really nervous my voice starts shaking alot alot, it‘s bad. But for some reason since i’m at uni i dont suck so much i can get through the daily presentations without overthinking what i’m going to say. I even joined theater group i’m going insane for public speaking. And sudfenly today at this presentation my voice started trembeling really bad, but next level, i dont think it had ever gotten this terrible, and my hands were shaking and i repeated myself soso much and i swear i wasnt even nervous i dont know what happened, and i dont remember anything i said and i had to apologize multiple times during the presentation cause i didnt know what to say and words werent coming out of my mouth i feel so embaressed, i felt 12 again. And now i feel so embarressed to talk to my clasmates bc they dont know me, like if i had that happend to me in high school it was way less embarrassing cause they already thought i was a loser but at uni i was doing great with people. I dont think anyone is gonna remember this for much longer than a week but it was really bad guys, if i saw someone else do that i would for sure talk about it with my friends, and of course feel bad for that person but i reslly dont want people feeling bad for me or making fun of me. But this week i’ve slept 2 hours a day because i had so much homework and projects (including the one i had to present today) so i’m blaiming it on that. Omgomg i just keep getting flashbacks i want to die so bad. And i keep rethinking my existance cause wtf am i doing in a theater group when i cant even talk in front of 20 people OGMOGM AAADHHGGHH!
