And I primarily do it for myself, but hearing that people enjoy things Iā€™ve written is a nice bonus. I think the act of creation at its base level often stems from a compulsion to externalize and make permanent feelings or ideas that are bouncing around in oneā€™s head because thoughts are so ephemeral like cupping water in your hands, so maybe to create is just pouring it into a glass and looking at it within a contained vessel
Jan 17, 2025

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For me, while i am not in a super creative job force, the big reason I stopped creating is because I felt immense pressure to create for a profit or recognition from people. I felt like I had to do things to be better or comparable to other creators. and then when I put too much time into it with little result, I would become upset. What I do now is have the expectation in my head that anything I do, I do it for myself and my own amusement. Itā€™s not to sell something, or to gloat about it social media. I just do it to get the creative energy out.
Jan 7, 2025
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a lot of hobbies pushed to us are surrounded by consumption. we watch shows, movies. consume albums, buy clothes and items, etc. not that there's anything inherently wrong with consuming, but consumption without creation breeds dullness. we all have creativity within us. it gets beaten out when there are expections to commoditize your creativity. you feel the need to be the best, to be perfect in the first shot at something. creation without the expectation of consumption is how we push back. i write poetry, even if it sucks. i drew a pig going to bed in a room full of disproportinately sized furniture because i felt like it. i'm looking to start dancing again. the world has so much that's yet to be made, and we're blessed with the ability to contribute to that body of art.
Jan 8, 2025
šŸŽØ
I love creating with my thoughts and then translating those thoughts into my life. I think about creating art with any resource, with words, with drawing, with self expression.
Apr 18, 2024

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ā€œLife shrinks or expands in proportion to one's courage.ā€ ā€” AnaĆÆs Nin This is uncharacteristically raw and personal, even for me, and pretty heavy! I know many of you have seen me posting through it and I feel safe to talk about it openly now that Iā€™ve safely landed at the start of my new life. Itā€™s honestly even a little bit embarrassing but I think itā€™s important to share. Iā€™ve never publicly mentioned it on here, but I have a husband; as of Friday, weā€™d have been together for 11 years, and weā€™ve been married for 3 years as of 2/22. I realize now that I wanted to explore what I looked like outside of my relationship with him because I had lost that. This is why PI.FYI has been so meaningful to me as a space to express myself and connect with peopleā€”to rediscover my voice. I had been living a lie this entire time, to others but worst of all to myself. Heā€™s been verbally and emotionally abusive, physically but without touching me, to the point that every day I spent with him I was in danger. Iā€™ve been shrinking myself and walking on eggshells to avoid making him insecure and provoking his casual put-downs and fits of rage, while hanging on for dear life to the threads of good I could see. Iā€™ve wanted so badly to leave, more than anything, but I felt like there was no way out and that this was just something I would need to endure indefinitelyā€”but someone who is so very dear to me helped me see that I have wings to fly, not by acting as my savior but by reminding me of my own power. The emotional safety they built and the gentle care they showed me made me feel like I could open up to them. With their encouragement I was brave enough to tell the truth to my friends, my family, my boss, and they have received me with warm, loving and open arms and rallied to support and protect me. The financial andĀ  logistical aspects were the most intimidating to me and itā€™s going to be tough for a while but Iā€™m going to be better than okay! Now Iā€™m opening up to you. This isnā€™t the only abuse Iā€™ve suffered in my life, and my old therapist told me she believed it was my mission to share my strength and light with others to inspire them and show them that change is possible. I hope that by sharing this, I can reach even just one person who is going through something similar and show that they are not alone, and they are not weak. People with certain backgrounds may be more vulnerable to abuse, but it can happen to anyone. It thrives in darkness, shame, and isolationā€”and breaking that silence is the first step toward freedom. Leaving is the scariest thing I have ever done but I have so many angels around me, and I am endlessly grateful. Thank you for being here with me šŸ’Œ
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My dad teases me about how when I was a little kid, my favorite thing to do when I was on the landline phone with somebodyā€”be it a relative or one of my best friendsā€”was to breathlessly describe the things that were in my bedroom so that they could have a mental picture of everything I loved and chose to surround myself with, and where I sat at that moment in time. Perfectly Imperfect reminds me of that so thanks for always listening and for sharing with me too šŸ’Œ
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Schedule sent my resignation email for the morning, effective immediately āœ…šŸ’…
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