Iām very excited about it and it just feels right. I think women start reaching their peak hotness at age 40 and then continue to age like fine wine so Iām looking forward to that too. My plan is to start seriously attempting to grow up in some ways but weāll see how that goes; Iām probably just going to extend my adolescence in other ways because I have the freedom to do that. Mostly I just keep thinking about how when I was a kid who were 30 seemed so OLD but to be fair itās not my fault they were like balding. Or like I keep seeing that people I know from high school are parents or watching things and being shocked that the mom characters are my age š¤” but I donāt know it honestly feels pretty meaningless and arbitrary to me to mark and judge my life using age as a measurement
Jan 9, 2025
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Iām really not ready to join the mid-20s club this year š I really hope aging becomes sexy for everyone so I can stop feeling like my value will decline as a femme person as I age š„²
Aug 3, 2024
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In other words, being 30. Feels good to be a grown up.
Jan 31, 2024
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30, 40, 50 ā theyāre nothing like how they looked when I was a kid!
Part of this I attribute to the Internet and feeling much more aware of or connected to the younger worlds than I otherwise would be. Plus I have no kids and few responsibilities.
I remember when my dad turned 40 and we had a party for him being āOver the Hillā with black balloons and stuff lol
Feb 18, 2025
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āLife shrinks or expands in proportion to one's courage.ā
ā AnaĆÆs Nin
This is uncharacteristically raw and personal, even for me, and pretty heavy! I know many of you have seen me posting through it and I feel safe to talk about it openly now that Iāve safely landed at the start of my new life. Itās honestly even a little bit embarrassing but I think itās important to share.
Iāve never publicly mentioned it on here, but I have a husband; as of Friday, weād have been together for 11 years, and weāve been married for 3 years as of 2/22. I realize now that I wanted to explore what I looked like outside of my relationship with him because I had lost that. This is why PI.FYI has been so meaningful to me as a space to express myself and connect with peopleāto rediscover my voice.
I had been living a lie this entire time, to others but worst of all to myself. Heās been verbally and emotionally abusive, physically but without touching me, to the point that every day I spent with him I was in danger. Iāve been shrinking myself and walking on eggshells to avoid making him insecure and provoking his casual put-downs and fits of rage, while hanging on for dear life to the threads of good I could see.
Iāve wanted so badly to leave, more than anything, but I felt like there was no way out and that this was just something I would need to endure indefinitelyābut someone who is so very dear to me helped me see that I have wings to fly, not by acting as my savior but by reminding me of my own power. The emotional safety they built and the gentle care they showed me made me feel like I could open up to them. With their encouragement I was brave enough to tell the truth to my friends, my family, my boss, and they have received me with warm, loving and open arms and rallied to support and protect me. The financial andĀ logistical aspects were the most intimidating to me and itās going to be tough for a while but Iām going to be better than okay!
Now Iām opening up to you. This isnāt the only abuse Iāve suffered in my life, and my old therapist told me she believed it was my mission to share my strength and light with others to inspire them and show them that change is possible.
I hope that by sharing this, I can reach even just one person who is going through something similar and show that they are not alone, and they are not weak. People with certain backgrounds may be more vulnerable to abuse, but it can happen to anyone. It thrives in darkness, shame, and isolationāand breaking that silence is the first step toward freedom.
Leaving is the scariest thing I have ever done but I have so many angels around me, and I am endlessly grateful. Thank you for being here with me š
Mar 16, 2025
My dad teases me about how when I was a little kid, my favorite thing to do when I was on the landline phone with somebodyābe it a relative or one of my best friendsāwas to breathlessly describe the things that were in my bedroom so that they could have a mental picture of everything I loved and chose to surround myself with, and where I sat at that moment in time. Perfectly Imperfect reminds me of that so thanks for always listening and for sharing with me too š
Feb 23, 2025
Schedule sent my resignation email for the morning, effective immediately ā
š
Feb 27, 2025