Rec
šŸ¬
My mind is made of bubbles Synapses pop here and there Take me in different directions Through alleyways and down steep stairs My emotions come and go like the mornings receding tide Shift like piss swift dribbling down drainage pipes and play-place slides My words are drool upon your feet My eyes are hung like frozen coals Or snot that freezes and puddles In jacket arms, on brand new clothes The mirror is a needle but these ropes are all the same I built my house on a rock in sands so that I can be displaced by strange rogue waves Sometimes screaming doesn’t help Today I can’t talk at all Self harm gets only a couple chuckles when friends come round to call My loves tears taste like cinnamon I can’t swallow without spitting up Ones once loved don’t talk to me because my medicine makes me less fun I cry every other night over folks I chose to hang around My room is set on fire every time I say something and don’t like how it sounds Good grief, bang the drum all day
Dec 29, 2024

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Really i am coarsing through your veins. Bleeding you out. Striking a cord. Relinquishing my spine. Relegating autonomy to the massive misogyny. Reckless. unstable and a brat. Something to say at the least appropriate moment, It was us all along. The flute stayed in tune. I decided long ago I would stay. Only to let go of who I actually was. Be there when you can. You never were. Bribe your way to my heart. Lend a helping hand. Decide to be yourself. The glass shatters and I reflect on myself and who I used to be. Bad bad bad. All the same to me, I don’t care if you die of thirst. Your green with envy and it shows. Quite the pussy cat. The elixer is mid greatfuly so. I take my bath and lay myself bare. It shows. Just where have you been. All the while I have been searching and finding no release as to who I want to be. I choose this time. I decide where to put it. Wide awake and endlessly falling asleep.
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Tightly drawn smiles Loosely fitted Scrubbing the drain, circling it even Settling dust Yearning for movement A force of nature An action plan, a family man Laying down foundations For impersonations Renting down the river, Winding up a creek With two fists To open my favourite window And forget to close it Letting the debris in If bin lorries could tell stories They'd sleep in an unmade bed every night Wednesday morning, mother's warning The man walks his dog Through oppressive heats And violent winds Why can't you do the same? Stop seeking answers And seek a home Stay there, stay away The pegging to clothesline pipeline Against brick walls My balls bounce and fall A pinch and a tuck never hurt much But where do I lay my head at night? How many mistakes Should I contemplate Were the force of nature Blowing out my last birthday candle With a giggle A tightly drawn wiggle A master of mimicry But I know you, I see you Your silk cocoon Never strung for permanence Your writhing In step-by-step conniving will End when you wake To find yourself decaying Stuffed in your rotten beanpod Full of somebody else's shit You never open the window, you see
Jun 23, 2025

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I could live better if I tried My sink would have fewer dishes The thought of eating would not cause my body to feel tired and weak I dream of the taste of fresh fruit but all I can manage are fried pre packaged frozen disks of various substances Fruit never stays It deflates in my refrigerator What was six apples becomes three, becomes piles of fruity flesh Carcasses rotting like innocence in the glow of a small white bulb Watching the life leave, confined to a cheap plastic cubicle The spirit was never there to begin with All I am ever allowed is dead Brought from the store to my refrigerator like from an accident to a morgue To stay cold
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