A portal into mid-20's desperation and longing, and finding joy even when you're struggling. It's soothing to know that young people have always felt this way. The scene of them rolling down the hill at the end is one of the most beautiful and perfect things I've ever seen.
Dec 28, 2024

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feels a bit sillier watching it as i get older as i myself am now detached from that weight you feel as a teenager, but it will always be my comfort movie, it takes me back to a good place
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Listen, I've watched Little Women about ten times but FOR SOME REASON, only a couple days ago when watching it with a best friend did we both start crying. We had both watched the movie many times before, but i guess this specific time in our life where this movie found us hit different. She's in her first year in college and I'm in my gap. The overwhelming feeling of loneliness that can take over when entering a new phase in your life is UNMATCHED, and jo's monologue just hit. Watching the movie, there are these very evident hard cuts between the warmth of childhood and coldness of the present, BUT when you actually think about it, can you recall the moment in the movie it BECOMES the present, and the color shifts? Probably not, because time is subtle. You don't wake up and suddenly realize you're a grown up who must make your own way in the world. Its more of a retrospective. Jo herself probably didn't realize her childhood was as warm and beautiful as it was.... until it was gone. Anyways we cried and laughed about why we were crying, but I haven't been able to think about it since. I don't know where I am in the color palette sunset of warm to cold, but I will know once I've long passed it.
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i like to think about taking up space in terms of circles. on a day to day basis, the size of the circle for your basic needs (drinking water, eating food, etc) doesn't really change at all. like, there's no way to minimize those needs without messing up your health (speaking as a formerly dehydrated and constantly hungry person). the circles for the other parts of your life do change- hobbies, work, etc- but also tend to change relatively slowly. when i felt bad about taking up space in the past, i moved my circles away from people-i would journal alone, eat in my car, etc. i was still taking up the same amount of space, but just doing so away from other people. what helped me feel a bit better was gently nudging my circles towards other people again- instead of eating in my car, i would eat lunch on the grass in the park (impromptu picnic), or journal in a cafe. i was still doing the activities alone, but in the same public spaces as other people. it's helpful because there's no pressure from either side to interact, but a lot of wonderful spontaneous interactions do happen that are invited from both sides. it made me feel better about taking up space because i felt like i was part of a broader social fabric, but didn't feel self-conscious about whether i belonged or not. so just keep nudging your circle of needs and hobbies closer to other people's until you overlap :)
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he must have big shoes to fill
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