idk if this is a helpful rec but as someone who is chronically on their phone, at one point i just had to be like a) this is a you problem and b) you're never gonna not have this problem. idk what your specific situation is, but for me, once i came to terms with the fact that i fundamentally like the internet and the services social media offers me it was a lot easier to alleviate the guilt of being on it. BUT (and this is the hard part) there is no hacking your way off social media--you just have to do it. once you've accepted it as part of your life you just got to look at yourself every once and a while and say no this is not all i want to be obviously this is easier said than done, but the best thing is to just set a time limit on your phone as a reminder, and then by sheer force of will, keep yourself off it. setting a time limit can be helpful because to use it you have to input a password, but let's be real it's not a high bar, and if we're being honest when i really want to use it i don't think about it at all. but yeah getting off social media is like loosing weight: at one point you just have to start cutting things out and telling yourself its for the better; understanding that one doom scroll on a saturday won't kill you, but also knowing that giving yourself this one excuse puts every other one on the table. at this point, i'm sort of at a harm reduction juncture in my social media journey .
Nov 26, 2024
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crazy talk from me, idc. i've been slowly weening off my social media consumption, but it's not been enough!! some things i've done to combat it have helped slightly, but i realize the only way to really get free of it is just cut it.
i've seen a lot of people talking about "dumbing down" their phones/tech to only house the essentials. there are apps for iOS and Android that make things like that possible. also like.. i think they make dumb phones from factory, but i'll have to dig deeper for that.
it's gonna be painful the first period of time, but it's worth it. even the little bit i've done has cut some really strong ties to my phone. i really depend only on apps that have messaging (discord, iMessage, FB messenger [not as much]). However, sometimes i get sucked down a rabbit hole if i get sidetracked.
i see a lot of people comparing doomscrolling to an addiction and they couldn't be more right. bc it is an addiction. it's a trap. only way to really get out of it is to shut it off completely.
May 2, 2025
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For over a year I had the "world's tiniest ruggedized phone". I don't remember the brand but I bet you can google it. Regardless, I still found myself using Instagram and Facebook on the tiny little screen 🥲. When they say social media is made to be addictive I fully believe it. App blockers, making my screen grey scale after 6pm, none of it works. I delete the settings, I remove the blocker.
The best things I've done for myself that is SO much easier said than done is 1. remove the thing from your life that you're trying to avoid and/or 2. Embrace the thing you're trying to avoid.
For me 1. Was a terrible job and 2. Was silence and boredom
Sep 30, 2024
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Ive wasted so much of my life glued to my phone and although it hasn't been detrimental to my health or social life this addiction is holding me back from doing many things. It's hard to try and stray away from social media because most of the time, when i'm not on my phone I feel like i'm missing out on what's going. The feeling of needing to know trends, memes, and drama becomes draining to my mind. There are so many things which are way more productive and life enriching that I want to do but the ongoing feeling of needing to scroll one more time prevents me from doing these things. I'm aware that this all sounds like a lame excuse but for many this is a big problem. I feel somewhat disgusted with how lazy ive become, and Ive always felt like I never had time to do certain things, but as I look back it's simply because of that damn phone. It's time for me to stop caring about all the stupid shit I scroll past every single day and make a change. Definitely deleting TikTok and only keeping instagram for my friends. So this year and then on, I hope to read more, learn more, write more, and simply enjoy the world, with the hope to reconnect with myself and truly understand who I am as a person. I wish you all the same.
Jan 14, 2025
Top Recs from @mdoinurmom
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if you think you’re the smartest person in your friend group you’re weird and annoying. the best friendships come out of mutual awe and respectability. be friends with people who make you want to know more things.
Jan 29, 2024
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i will never be in a situationship in the same way i will never be in the land of oz--it's just not real. i think using the word doesn't let you self-reflect in a way that is truly helpful. i was telling my friend about the awkwardness of seeing an exhook up in a relationship bc i thought we had mutual feelings and she said "oh your exsituationship" and i thought (for the first time) no, we had clear boundaries i just got my hopes up. my point is that instead of using situationship as a catch-all for not quite dating or wtv failed prospect, take it as a moment to reflect on what exactly went wrong. idk if this is profound or not
Jan 30, 2025
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idk if any of this will be remotely helpful, but this is generally how i see socializing
to find friends:
1. do something consistently
2. do something where other people are also (generally) by themselves
3. do something that requires discussion
exercise classes, coffee shops, open studios, libraries, organizing/protesting/charity work; really to acquire friends you just have to do things that's it. do things you like so you are around people who share similar interests and thus will have a higher "friend hit rate" but really the most essential point on the list is the first one (the other two are nice bonus'). with enough consistency you become noticed and then boom.
on becoming friends:
1. open invites
2. follow ups
now that you've just met some people, get them into your circle by open inviting them to things. if you're going out later that night, offer for them to join. if you're both in a pottery class maybe offer an open invite to a gallery you're visiting. this is how you shift casual acquaintances to actual friends. the important thing is to concretize your plans tho. you're not trying to pressure them but you do want to make them feel like it was more than just a vapid offer, so after you suggest it wait a bit and follow up with details. this also goes for the reverse of being given an open invite.
on being friends:
1. do
the best piece of advice (which might have come from pi.fyi) is that sometimes you just need to be the doer. maybe you see a tiktok about a picnic with friends and you think dang wouldn't it would be cool if my friends did that. well, there's nothing stopping you, you have to be the friend that does stuff. obviously this is a little time consuming and exhausting but generally people want to pay it forward so once you get the ball rolling on the friend group doing stuff, people usually follow suit
also fear is the mind killer, go forth and be
Jan 27, 2025