😃
these past few days, I have dragged my tired carcass into the sun and plopped myself into the nearest body of water. I’m lucky — I live near to a lot of accessible points of natural release, both in sand and in seaweed paper.
in recognition of my privilege, let me also acknowledge my humble suffering. i have lived in tiring grey coals of concrete and felt the abyss of constant chatter and gritty grey tear away at my flesh. i never said it would be easy, moving outside of what you know, but its always worth it. i am sooo depressed from November - Feb… why not do all the things I’ve wanted to do, in whatever capacity I can?
July 11/24
Jul 12, 2024
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💧
I’ve been having a hard time lately and I really wanted to abandon the day but instead I’m saying hello to the bus driver with pink puffy eyes I’m letting tears fall freely onto the park bench I’m staring despondently out the sandwich shop window
It’s not about romanticizing your sadness. It’s actually not about you at all. It’s about the unusually colored pigeon and the dad and son throwing a football while they walk down the street and hearing Chaka Khan’s My Love is Alive blaring from a modded 2003 Honda civic that will, even if it’s just briefly, pull you out of the cave.
Allow your feelings to interact with the world. Find reminders of what life was, is, and can be beyond and within these feelings.
Go for a walk, enjoy the taste of your salty tears, and when you’re ready, lay down in the grass until you’re itchy enough to remember there are sensations other than this dull ache. Then buy yourself an impracticality large bottle of water. Maybe go see a movie by yourself.
May 4, 2024
🩻
When you’re in a slump, you’re in a slump.
Let yourself feel things. The good and the bad. I welcome them like a visitor and I invite them at the pretend dinner table in my head and get to know them, and I try not to ask them why they’re here. Why I feel things. I just let them be. Know that this will pass, just like a person visiting for a few nights and I try not to hold on to them when they’re ready to leave (yes those feelings will pass). Sounds very cliché but they do.
From my experience, the longer I fight the sadness/depression/slump, the longer it stays. I’ve learned just to take it day by day. This wouldn’t be possible without months of therapy where it was revealed to me that I’ve been so hard on myself almost my entire life.
I also meditate every night for 15-20 minutes. I take this activity so seriously, just a few minutes to close my eyes and release the tension I’ve felt the whole day. I love staying still. I love to close my eyes and think of nothing. My drive will come back.
What also helps (for me) is taking a few minutes a day to go outside and letting the sun touch my skin. It feels so good. Listen to the birds. Listen to the traffic. Just observe your surroundings and remember that there is life outside you and you are a part of something big and eventually you get inspired by something. May it be small or big. It will come back to you.
Be gentle and kind to yourself <3
Apr 25, 2024
🫠
I truly believe the only way to appreciate the times that life feels good is to have some designated wallowing time a couple times a month. What I mean by this is just letting yourself feel like a piece of shit and getting through it all anyways. Right now I feel like garbage but my routine continues - I just do it WHILE feeling my feelings. Repression and avoidance is as stupid as holding ur hand in front of your face to shield from a rainstorm. Let all flow like water baby ✌️🌧
Apr 2, 2024
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Apr 11, 2025
I got my nails done and I realized the star on the index finger makes the nails PI themed. Semi unconscious yet a soft-smile realization while the nail tech was painting the star on.
Dec 18, 2024
✈️
Bring back being genuine about your suffering on the internet. was that ever really a thing? is tumblr just a social anecdote to a form of media we thought / wished we had?
*^ little miss avoidant. or maybe indirect? dw folks it was amicable! he has a heart of gold! which makes me even more miserable…
#gointhruthemotions #humanbeingbehaviour
Apr 6, 2025