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This vid popped up on the sidebar of an NBA dunks highlight video and changed my life. Seriously
The premise of the lecture is that we can learn to provide ourselves with the compassion we want from other people to alleviate shame. There is a great exercise at the end that teaches you how to identify the physiological signs of shame which I have already found super helpful in stopping myself from spiralling into shame before it happens.
I have felt so weird going through my regular life feeling like a different person after watching this and not knowing how to express that to people. I've made progress in deconstructing shame in the past few years but it never clicked until I saw this. I hope it helps someone else the way it helped me
Apr 15, 2024
Related Recs
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The Gifts of Imperfection by Brene Brown. Its short and active and effective
agree with the others for Meditation
i do a support group that I find tremendously helpful
A big switch came for me when I started changing my thinking from "once i do enough X work or X activities or X skills, then surely i will feel better about myself" towards just trying to be aight with myself right now, accepting that im Good Enough right now. ive been working on all this for years now, and its gotten considerably better! wishing u well! if u ever want to share more feel free to reach out
Apr 9, 2024
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She has a course on Insight Timer about releasing blame and resentment that I loved. but if you want something free I would recommend her RAIN meditations on YouTube. This linked one is specific to anger and blame
Feb 26, 2025
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I think that the dread is held inside of you and it's not something that can simply be let go of, and you have to sit with the dread because it is the terrible reality of what it means to be living as you are where you are. And it goes without saying that that specific experience is above and beyond what any human being should have to endure, let alone be expected to continue going through the world with. And so I don't have anything but solidarity from another country and:
- Somatic movement literally changed my life. You are forced to embody yourself without over-intellectualising exactly what your body is, you just have to be in it, and it makes you connect with this very internal part of yourself that is not defined by sociopolitical structure and it's lowkey emotional asf and I am a very cynical person who was made to change my mind
so, if you can find/afford/have capacity to pay for classes that work for you, I would recommend yoga, tai chi, or any form of movement class like biomechanics or something along those lines (I would also argue climbing counts as somatic movement)
if not, I think there is something to be said for a YouTube video that you listen to instead of watching, in the privacy of your own space, just moving your body
- If this is too slow and difficult, my other favourite somatic exercise is just to put in AirPods and lock the door and dance and dance and dance. This eased my clinical dread when antidepressants were not working. they do not want you dancing. therefore it is very important to do so
Mar 14, 2025
Top Recs from @biff_smidgeon
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I always bring a kite to picnics. My go to is the Prism Bora - it's a great flier and folds up small enough to fit in a fanny pack. There's something magic about flying a kite that reconnects you with nature and it feels special to share that with friends
Apr 15, 2024
My everyday recipe is by Preppy Kitchen. If I have time I like to brown the butter first. The biggest tip though is to let the cookie dough sit in the fridge overnight before baking. I know that sounds impossible but there is science behind it and the difference is huge. Here's Kenji Lopez from the Food Lab's explanation on why:
"An overnight rest allows enzymes to break down large carbohydrates, enhancing the caramelization and browning process the next day to help the cookies develop deeper flavor."
Godspeed good luck on the cookies 🫡
Apr 15, 2024
my sister's recipe. These are the perfect after lunch / mid day snack. Hits the sweet tooth but keeps you full because they have some fiber and protein. I like to sub some protein powder for hot cocoa mix.
Apr 15, 2024