Rec
⭐
In the latter half of 2019, Sloane Crosley’s New York apartment was broken into. Luckily she wasn’t home, but the burglar(s) had ransacked her bedroom and made off with several pieces of jewelry, much of it handed down from her maternal grandmother. That neither she nor her mother were particularly fond of said grandmother was neither here nor there, they were still Sloane’s things and now they were gone. Dealing with such an intrusion and the material loss that went along with it would be hard enough, but only one month later her best friend and one-time boss Russell Perreault hanged himself.
This sudden shock sets her adrift as she struggles to come to terms with the reality of it. He had been a constant in her life for so many years and the mere act of accepting that he was gone was challenge enough, let alone learning to live with it. In a way, having the robbery to focus on proves to be a blessing, as investigating it provides at least some brief moments of distraction. When COVID-19 sends the city into lockdown a few months later, she is left with little but time to reflect on the loss and finally try to make peace with it.
Much of this book was written essentially as it was happening to her, though of course edited and rewritten later, which gives it a confessional tone. Crosley’s writing is eloquent and often funny, but still down-to-earth and easily relatable. The affection she has towards Russell is obvious as she takes us through several fond memories, but this isn’t a hagiography, and she delves into some of his faults in an effort to try and understand what could have led him to take his own life. Despite the weighty subject matter this brief book is a joy to read. As someone who has experienced the loss of a best friend and also the suicides of others who were close by, the emotions and thoughts documented within ring true, and reading about someone else going through them is a surprisingly cathartic experience. ★★★★★
Mar 6, 2024
Related Recs
Rec
This book is a chronicle of the author’s life in the year after her husband unexpectedly passes away while their daughter is in a coma. I also happened to read this at a time in my life when I had recently:
a.) gotten married b.) learned a friend was dying
Seems like a bummer from the summary above, and the content is definitely heavy, but this book really spoke to me at a time in my life when I was feeling a little lost amidst some big life changes. I recommend it to a lot of my friends after they get married - there’s some really great reflections on how amazing it is to share your life with someone, and the ways that you’ll miss them when they’re gone.
I’d always enjoyed reading, but this was the first time that I experienced one of those magical moments when a piece of literature, a movie, etc. can line up perfectly with your life and help you work through some of the things that are happening to and around you.
a.) gotten married b.) learned a friend was dying
Seems like a bummer from the summary above, and the content is definitely heavy, but this book really spoke to me at a time in my life when I was feeling a little lost amidst some big life changes. I recommend it to a lot of my friends after they get married - there’s some really great reflections on how amazing it is to share your life with someone, and the ways that you’ll miss them when they’re gone.
I’d always enjoyed reading, but this was the first time that I experienced one of those magical moments when a piece of literature, a movie, etc. can line up perfectly with your life and help you work through some of the things that are happening to and around you.
Rec
If you’re interested in the neurobiology and psychology of grief, I read the grieving brain for a class I took and found it accessible and fascinating (Linked)
ive also already rec’d “a grief observed” by c.s. Lewis on here but it is truly one of the most poignant and beautiful things I’ve ever read, a heartbreaking personal meditation on loss, faith, and love. if you’re cool with reading something devoutly religious, I can’t recommend this enough. I’ve attached a photo of the opening lines.
Rec
A really unique perspective on the fluidity of pain (primarily in relation to chronic illness) and navigating the shifting mindset to cope with the pain.
Also a really interesting take on “friends for certain activities” - a friend you go to gigs with vs the friend you go for a morning jog with. How these friendships change us.
A fantastic quick read!
Also a really interesting take on “friends for certain activities” - a friend you go to gigs with vs the friend you go for a morning jog with. How these friendships change us.
A fantastic quick read!
Top Recs from @seanf
Rec
Not perfect, but easily their best album in years. Really enjoying it.
