Each letter is one million dollars. At this rate, I have purchased and sent a large quantity of fresh produce to the disproportionately obese island nation of Nauru. When I look in the mirror I scream "Charitable! Charitable!" at myself until I fall to my knees in tears, misty-eyed at my kindness. And my hedons double when the ocean carries over the sound waves from someone in Nauru biting into a crisp, organic apple.
