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there's an abject horror to trying on eyewear in public. if you're stricken with uncharacteristic joie de vivre at the sidewalk stand, you might pick up a pair of insta-bait sunnies; hearts, flames, or god forbid the quintessential symbol of cool-- ray bans (just like goddamn tom cruise wore in risky business). you sheepishly look up at the mirror only do realize you are not a baddie and scramble to hide them before anyone can see you recognize your own limitations during dress up.
today i went to the family eye doctor with my mom, which has potent regression abilities. my insurance covers a new frame every year so there's immense weight to this decision. i remember being in 8th grade begging for the tyler oakley horn rims. *shiver*
the woman helping us is an estranged friend of my mom's, meaning it stays in the office. they run around amassing a pile of options for me like i'm a little boy prince. after a period of squinting and head-cocking at a square frame "not working for my round face and making my eyes look weird" its clear the attendant would like to wrap it up and settle on any old pair, but my mom has already planted her roots until i find the perfect look despite the line beginning to form.
demonstrating expert resistance training, this disregard for social graces in service of a personal win is truly invigorating. *click* she loudly takes an unflattering photo of me on her phone so i can see what it looks like "in real life".
fuck it, let me see that pair with the tortoiseshell arms!!! thanks for looking out!!
Related Recs
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It feels so “teen movie makeover/costume/shopping montage” without the effort of putting on/changing clothes.
Dec 18, 2023
They have diamantes down the arms and they came in the classic red old lady glasses case and I love them. No choice but to perch them on the end of my nose and peer over them to express judgement. In my grandmacore era
Jul 11, 2024
I still feel like I don’t need to always wear my glasses, but I did in fact fail my visual test for my drivers license renewal. I splurged on a pair of prescription sunglasses and I’ll never go back.
Only downside with these is that you can see my eyes and I can’t pretend to be mysterious.
Jun 3, 2024
Top Recs from @unqletio
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steel cut oats soaked in flax milk, a little maple syrup, and cold brew overnight. then top with plant based yogurt (coconut is good) a dusting of cocoa powder, and a couple chocolate chips (not too decadent now!)
Jan 16, 2024
went to the camera museum in south plainfield NJ which was in a decrepit mansion run by two lovely senile men. ended up getting a free hi8 camera and books out of it so dont forget these strange pockets of your municipality
Jan 30, 2024
prepare for a whimsical journey amigo. Los Hijos Del Sol and Los Zheros are a great jumping off point. Cuarto Oscuro is great. Check out the Roots of Chicha compilation album!
Mar 20, 2024